Wife wanted kids since we got married. Infertility made it nearly impossible, but after 8 rounds of IVF we finally got one, then round 9 was a dud, but round 10

Wife wanted kids since we got married. Infertility made it nearly impossible, but after 8 rounds of IVF we finally got one, then round 9 was a dud, but round 10 was our 2nd. I often wavered and thought, I'm cool not having kids. Now that I have them, it's a totally different thing. You become someone completely different. You live for nothing else but seeing what new cute thing your kid does today. The other day my 1.5 year old took his sock off and said "I did IT!" in a partial squeal. Cutest fucking thing I ever saw. Sometimes they make your life a living hell, but you get to see them make choices, and decisions and in a way you get to live your life again through them. When our first was born, I had deep bouts of depression. The only thing that could bring me out of them was just cuddling with him on the couch. You look down at this little guy who needs you for everything, and its hard to be selfish and think of self-harm. I got therapy and stuff, and found out i had ADHD and my lack of focus was causing my depression. Been better ever since, even lost 90 pounds. Lots of people probably feel the opposite that kids hold them back, but some people just aren't meant to have kids. Some people are so mad that schools are closed because they have no clue how to be a parent and be with their kids extra time (the ones who were already homemakers or stay-at-home or had the money to afford to, not the ones who need schools for childcare to work). I mean a lot of people try to spend as little time w/ their kids during the week as possible and do a family activity on Saturday and that's that. So, it's definitely a tough decision. Like I said, I wasn't really sure anymore, esp w/ my depression and stuff, but wife insisted so I kept signing the paperwork and paying the bills. Now, I'd not change a thing and can't imagine what I'd do without my two little boys. I get teary eyed with parent/child bonding crap now, and songs about fatherhood like Fade in / Fade out. It really messes up your sentimentality switches in the head.