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> That removes your agency...........land you continue to live with the hurt. My agency is from moving on not based on forgiveness. you can't just blanket clas

by sngz 6y ago

> That removes your agency...........land you continue to live with the hurt. My agency is from moving on not based on forgiveness. you can't just blanket classify everyone's hurtfulness. Sometimes even after you forgive someone you're still going to continue to live in hurt. other times you can move on and not forgive someone and not be hurt anymore. It has nothing to do with forgiveness. Moving on is part of and a prerequisite for forgiveness, but not the other way around. > The other person need not be involved in forgiveness in any way..... Forgiveness is only between you and yourself. yep that is all true. and me and myself thinks that guy doesn't deserve forgiveness. I'm not losing sleep over it or suffering in anyway. Simply I don't associate myself with that person anymore and not have them be part of my life. Even if I forgive someone I don't tell them. People in this thread seems to have different definitions of forgiveness and mix up acceptance/moving on with actual forgiveness of someones actions.

basch 6y ago
>Sometimes even after you forgive someone you're still going to continue to live in hurt. No, that would not be forgiveness. Forgiveness is you overcoming the negative emotion. >other times you can move on and not forgive someone and not be hurt anymore. That would be forgiveness. >Simply I don't associate myself with that person anymore That would be a lack of reconciliation. Reconciliation is not a requirement of forgiveness. What you are describing is either excusing or pardoning. >Moving on is part of and a prerequisite for forgiveness, but not the other way around. There are multiple ways to move on, including forgetting. I am generally a descriptivist. I acknowledge there is a second definition of forgiveness that is incompatible and mutually exclusive with the first, and that many people commonly use the word that way. That second definition however does not invalidate the concept of Forgiveness, with a capital F. It doesn't erase the first meaning of the world. I am not going to call it "misuse of a word" but the word is being used extremely loosely to describe other concepts that have other defined words. In this case, precision and clarity are required in conversation, and using definition two to have a conversation about the meaning of the concept in definition one, becomes a circular argument.
- sngz 6y ago
  > Forgiveness is you overcoming the negative emotion no its not >other times you can move on and not forgive someone and not be hurt anymore. no its not, its called moving on > That would be a lack of reconciliation. Reconciliation is not a requirement of forgiveness. no forgiveness is between yourself so reconciliation has nothing to do with it. > There are multiple ways to move on, including forgetting. yep and forgiveness is one way to move on. but moving on is not forgiveness.

by sngz 6y ago

basch 6y ago

>Sometimes even after you forgive someone you're still going to continue to live in hurt. No, that would not be forgiveness. Forgiveness is you overcoming the negative emotion. >other times you can move on and not forgive someone and not be hurt anymore. That would be forgiveness. >Simply I don't associate myself with that person anymore That would be a lack of reconciliation. Reconciliation is not a requirement of forgiveness. What you are describing is either excusing or pardoning. >Moving on is part of and a prerequisite for forgiveness, but not the other way around. There are multiple ways to move on, including forgetting. I am generally a descriptivist. I acknowledge there is a second definition of forgiveness that is incompatible and mutually exclusive with the first, and that many people commonly use the word that way. That second definition however does not invalidate the concept of Forgiveness, with a capital F. It doesn't erase the first meaning of the world. I am not going to call it "misuse of a word" but the word is being used extremely loosely to describe other concepts that have other defined words. In this case, precision and clarity are required in conversation, and using definition two to have a conversation about the meaning of the concept in definition one, becomes a circular argument.

sngz 6y ago
> Forgiveness is you overcoming the negative emotion no its not >other times you can move on and not forgive someone and not be hurt anymore. no its not, its called moving on > That would be a lack of reconciliation. Reconciliation is not a requirement of forgiveness. no forgiveness is between yourself so reconciliation has nothing to do with it. > There are multiple ways to move on, including forgetting. yep and forgiveness is one way to move on. but moving on is not forgiveness.