You should tell this to your therapist and see what happens. To me I've learned a lot following this line of thought. For you, it sounds like you think that th

You should tell this to your therapist and see what happens. To me I've learned a lot following this line of thought. For you, it sounds like you think that the therapist "might just be doing it because I'm paying them", and that their emotions care towards you might not be genuine? Maybe that you want a kind of selfless care and the monetary aspect would make it feel less selfless or sincere?