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I went to a fairly atypical school district in Silicon Valley where you didn't have bullies beating kids up, so I probably can't understand what everyone else i

by zasz 18y ago

I went to a fairly atypical school district in Silicon Valley where you didn't have bullies beating kids up, so I probably can't understand what everyone else is talking about. In my experience, however, you only got shunned and had severe unpopularity if you were lacking in fairly basic social skills--like, say, not throwing a tantrum after turning six. To me, it seemed like being average and sort of blending in by not doing anything too socially awkward was enough to avoid getting picked on. I don't think basic social skills are that hard to pick up for most people, and you don't need to sacrifice being smart to have the basics of not being awkward. Does anyone have any comments?

rms 18y ago
Are you younger? I graduated high school in 2004 and it was a lot better than suburban high school in the past. This was at a reasonably wealthy, mostly white suburban high school near Pittsburgh (two turnpike exits from Paul Graham's high school, which was Pittsburgh's first uber-developed suburb, Monroeville). At my high school, the people who had in middle school been popular, had mostly gotten into hard drugs and been shunned by everyone else, though these people never realized they weren't popular anymore. The football players that weren't into hard drugs were all nice enough. The cheerleaders were mostly ugly. No one was really picked on, though there were three or for kids without physical or mental disabilities that sat with the kids with physical and mental disabilities at lunch. I was never popular but my senior year I became good friends with the class president, who played drums in the marching band with me. He was the most popular person in my high school and he was a rare geek with a great deal of social intelligence.
- zasz 18y ago
  Yes, class of 2005. Most people in Palo Alto are pretty gung-ho about sending their babies off to a Top 20 college, so being smart got you respect. The only people I could think of who I would consider ostracized in school were those who were incredibly annoying or awkward to be around, i.e. it was a matter of social skills, not being smart. I do realize I went to an atypical high school, but if you're socially incompetent, you may not recognize that your social problems arise from your social incompetence. That's why I'm a little suspicious of pg when he claims that he's seen both sides of the popularity scale and that he now knows the magic formulas to apply if he had to travel back in time.

by zasz 18y ago

rms 18y ago

Are you younger? I graduated high school in 2004 and it was a lot better than suburban high school in the past. This was at a reasonably wealthy, mostly white suburban high school near Pittsburgh (two turnpike exits from Paul Graham's high school, which was Pittsburgh's first uber-developed suburb, Monroeville). At my high school, the people who had in middle school been popular, had mostly gotten into hard drugs and been shunned by everyone else, though these people never realized they weren't popular anymore. The football players that weren't into hard drugs were all nice enough. The cheerleaders were mostly ugly. No one was really picked on, though there were three or for kids without physical or mental disabilities that sat with the kids with physical and mental disabilities at lunch. I was never popular but my senior year I became good friends with the class president, who played drums in the marching band with me. He was the most popular person in my high school and he was a rare geek with a great deal of social intelligence.

zasz 18y ago
Yes, class of 2005. Most people in Palo Alto are pretty gung-ho about sending their babies off to a Top 20 college, so being smart got you respect. The only people I could think of who I would consider ostracized in school were those who were incredibly annoying or awkward to be around, i.e. it was a matter of social skills, not being smart. I do realize I went to an atypical high school, but if you're socially incompetent, you may not recognize that your social problems arise from your social incompetence. That's why I'm a little suspicious of pg when he claims that he's seen both sides of the popularity scale and that he now knows the magic formulas to apply if he had to travel back in time.