4 ms·

> Why would having a larger pool make dating harder? FWIW, I have found online dating way harder than dating someone I met through friends/work/school. YMMV bu

by colmvp 6y ago

> Why would having a larger pool make dating harder? FWIW, I have found online dating way harder than dating someone I met through friends/work/school. YMMV but my theory is having access to that many more people leads one (including myself) to sometimes think there's someone more attractive/interesting out there instead of giving what's available to them a strong chance. I have two good friends who have been serial daters for years and they have Seinfeldian reasons as to why they didn't fit with someone. It made me think my God, "if everyone had your standards, literally no one would have a long term relationship." Interestingly, when I saw them date mutual friends back in Uni, the relationships were the longest they've had their entire lives. I'm convinced that a lot of stable marriages from people I know around me wouldn't have happened if they had tried first meeting online instead of happenstance in IRL situations, because person A wasn't the typical ethnicity that marries person B, or person A is much older than person B and wouldn't have fit in the filter, or person A isn't particularly photogenic, etc. I'm not trying to paint online dating as a bad thing as there are quite a number of success stories.

mensetmanusman 6y ago
This. I come from a strong family culture (dozens of cousins, off-spring, good communication, >95% stable long-lasting marriages, etc.), and we were taught that there is no perfect match. Love isn’t a feeling, it is an act of the will for the good of the other. Ergo, it’s your job to make the relationship work. Millennials without robust world-views haven’t yet figured out that the ‘fear of missing out’ is devastating to their pursuit of happiness.
- watwut 6y ago
  Millenials and young people are not more promiscuous and don't jump from relationship to relationship. They are more likely to be single or have long relationship. But less so trying out many partners. Also most Millenials are over 30 now.

by colmvp 6y ago

mensetmanusman 6y ago

This. I come from a strong family culture (dozens of cousins, off-spring, good communication, >95% stable long-lasting marriages, etc.), and we were taught that there is no perfect match. Love isn’t a feeling, it is an act of the will for the good of the other. Ergo, it’s your job to make the relationship work. Millennials without robust world-views haven’t yet figured out that the ‘fear of missing out’ is devastating to their pursuit of happiness.

watwut 6y ago
Millenials and young people are not more promiscuous and don't jump from relationship to relationship. They are more likely to be single or have long relationship. But less so trying out many partners. Also most Millenials are over 30 now.