You sound clinically depressed. I don't think being a man is why you failed. There is nothing wrong with working a job and slowly building wealth, especially so

You sound clinically depressed. I don't think being a man is why you failed. There is nothing wrong with working a job and slowly building wealth, especially someone who is supposedly a highly skilled software engineer - you can make retirement money in not-so-many years if you live frugally and save wisely. I seriously think you need some professional counseling.