I don't think you're lazy. It sounds like you're probably just avoiding frustration. I think we're creatures of habit. If you create a habit you will naturally

I don't think you're lazy. It sounds like you're probably just avoiding frustration. I think we're creatures of habit. If you create a habit you will naturally have the desire to keep doing the thing, even if it doesn't give you pleasure right away. If on top of that you add a little curiosity and a bit of desire to keep getting better you will quickly feel the need to do something with regularity. In fact I'd argue most things worth doing will be quite unsatisfactory for a time until you start feeling pleasure. A musical instrument? Programming? Painting? Writing? Sports? A new language? Cooking? Yeah you will be crap at all those until you aren't. The trick to getting started is having the willpower and the tolerance to frustration to keep doing the thing through the initial hardships. I struggled a lot with recognizing frustration in myself when I was younger which made learning to tolerate it even more difficult. Once you start feeling frustrated you have to remind yourself that everything is ok and that you will figure it out. You will never be immune to frustration, but by exposing yourself to frustration gradually your tolerance will get better.