I've never gotten to that point but definitely had a great moments when it wasn't entirely clear how I'd find the finances to continue without the support of fa

I've never gotten to that point but definitely had a great moments when it wasn't entirely clear how I'd find the finances to continue without the support of family financially and otherwise and much else in terms of a social safety net. The absolute lowest point was after a particularly bad first semester in second year that required much higher average in the second to retain good standing I received a letter in informing me not only that no longer qualified for the loans for academic performance but also that repayments wer soon to start. I think it eventually turned out to be a clerical error but I definitely had a few episodes wandering aimlessly from twilight to dawn questioning my ability to complete the degree, who I'd be able go to for support, how I'd live with myself if I took support and still failed, how I'd afford to pay it off or support myself if I dropped out right now, the embarrassment of doing so, rationality of choosing to double down on sunk costs vs potentially losing a once in a lifetime opportunity I'd already sunk so much into, and if I had really made the right decision in choosing to attend in the first place. Looking back though, the experiences and situations were so formative I sometimes wonder if to change them would be to dilute and erase oneself.