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Because the men that are willing to put in the effort are still having sex. Its not hard for a man to become attractive: eat right, exercise often, groom regula

by bjl 6y ago

Because the men that are willing to put in the effort are still having sex. Its not hard for a man to become attractive: eat right, exercise often, groom regularly, dress well, develop a compelling personality, cultivate relationships with interesting people. The fact that people who don't even try aren't able to have sex doesn't seem surprising (or bad).

ravitation 6y ago
You comically underestimate how hard those things are for many men, especially those that are economically disadvantaged. I don't agree with many of the takes in these comments, but your simplification to "just work harder" isn't any better.
- bjl 6y ago
  Economics doesn't have anything to do with these. - Eat Right - actually cheaper than eating unhealthy - Exercise Often - possible to do free - Groom regularly - very cheap, the cost of a haircut every couple of months - Develop a personality - free - Cultivate relationships - free
  - ravitation 6y ago
    Once again your ability to absurdly oversimplify things is truly astounding. The reason why one's economic situation is relevant (and it's relevant to essentially everything), is because it becomes a source of many other biological and social pressures that might prevent someone from spending time, for example, "[developing] a personality" (whatever that means).
quasarj 6y ago
> Its not hard for a man to become attractive Proceeds to list the most difficult things in life.
- bjl 6y ago
  None of the things listed are difficult at all. They take willpower and time, of course, but they aren't rocket science.
  - SwiftyBug 6y ago
    having willpower and time are two of the most dificult things in life.
    - bjl 6y ago
      Heartily disagree. If you have time to play video games and endlessly post on reddit, then you have time to get in shape and take a shower. Willpower's even easier barring mental illness (in which case they should see a doctor, not whine about women on the internet).
      - CameronNemo 6y ago
        I don't think showering is the one that is considered hard. It is the "develop a compelling personality" and "make friendships with interesting people" items that are most challenging. IME "compelling personality" is difficult to define, different for each potential partner, and often has to do with humor. The challenging bit is that some aspect of your personality that you care about a lot (love of math, plants, or music) might not matter to someone else. And humor can just as easily be hurtful as it can heal. Some jokes just land terribly.
      - lenkite 6y ago
        You can have a good body with a six-pack and still fail in a relationship - this is more true for men than women.
SwiftyBug 6y ago
That does not sound like "not hard".
karlakush 6y ago
> develop a compelling personality Hah, I love how you slipped this in right next to buying new clothes. Developing a compelling personality is not trivial. In fact, most people go their entire lives with developing a compelling personality. Might as well tell guys they just need to grow a little taller.
88840-8855 6y ago
Its not hard for a man to become attractive: just grow a little and be over 6ft. /discussion
mD5pPxMcS6fVWKE 6y ago
You forgot: those bastards don't even try to become taller.
mydongle 6y ago
It's not hard? Most of the things you list are things that a lot of people, no matter what gender or background, struggle with. The imbalance in the dating game comes from the fact that men are way more willing to accept a girl below their level. Not to mention all it takes is some makeup and complementary clothing to turn a 5/10 girl into a 7/10 or better who can start pulling guys way above her weight. Girls are taught not to settle. Rightfully so. I wish guys were taught the same. Then maybe things would be slightly different.
DreamScatter 6y ago
Some people like me just aren't interested in maintaining superficial friendships and social circles just to find a partner. I am plenty interesting without a social circle, and would rather have a relationship only with my partner and nobody else in it. This makes it more difficult. Socialization is for children, in my opinion, and I only want social interactions with a partner and not with a group of people (like i did as a kid).

by bjl 6y ago

ravitation 6y ago

You comically underestimate how hard those things are for many men, especially those that are economically disadvantaged. I don't agree with many of the takes in these comments, but your simplification to "just work harder" isn't any better.

bjl 6y ago
Economics doesn't have anything to do with these. - Eat Right - actually cheaper than eating unhealthy - Exercise Often - possible to do free - Groom regularly - very cheap, the cost of a haircut every couple of months - Develop a personality - free - Cultivate relationships - free
- ravitation 6y ago
  Once again your ability to absurdly oversimplify things is truly astounding. The reason why one's economic situation is relevant (and it's relevant to essentially everything), is because it becomes a source of many other biological and social pressures that might prevent someone from spending time, for example, "[developing] a personality" (whatever that means).

quasarj 6y ago

> Its not hard for a man to become attractive Proceeds to list the most difficult things in life.

bjl 6y ago
None of the things listed are difficult at all. They take willpower and time, of course, but they aren't rocket science.
- SwiftyBug 6y ago
  having willpower and time are two of the most dificult things in life.
  - bjl 6y ago
    Heartily disagree. If you have time to play video games and endlessly post on reddit, then you have time to get in shape and take a shower. Willpower's even easier barring mental illness (in which case they should see a doctor, not whine about women on the internet).
    - CameronNemo 6y ago
      I don't think showering is the one that is considered hard. It is the "develop a compelling personality" and "make friendships with interesting people" items that are most challenging. IME "compelling personality" is difficult to define, different for each potential partner, and often has to do with humor. The challenging bit is that some aspect of your personality that you care about a lot (love of math, plants, or music) might not matter to someone else. And humor can just as easily be hurtful as it can heal. Some jokes just land terribly.
    - lenkite 6y ago
      You can have a good body with a six-pack and still fail in a relationship - this is more true for men than women.

SwiftyBug 6y ago

That does not sound like "not hard".

karlakush 6y ago

> develop a compelling personality Hah, I love how you slipped this in right next to buying new clothes. Developing a compelling personality is not trivial. In fact, most people go their entire lives with developing a compelling personality. Might as well tell guys they just need to grow a little taller.

88840-8855 6y ago

Its not hard for a man to become attractive: just grow a little and be over 6ft. /discussion

mD5pPxMcS6fVWKE 6y ago

You forgot: those bastards don't even try to become taller.

mydongle 6y ago

It's not hard? Most of the things you list are things that a lot of people, no matter what gender or background, struggle with. The imbalance in the dating game comes from the fact that men are way more willing to accept a girl below their level. Not to mention all it takes is some makeup and complementary clothing to turn a 5/10 girl into a 7/10 or better who can start pulling guys way above her weight. Girls are taught not to settle. Rightfully so. I wish guys were taught the same. Then maybe things would be slightly different.

DreamScatter 6y ago

Some people like me just aren't interested in maintaining superficial friendships and social circles just to find a partner. I am plenty interesting without a social circle, and would rather have a relationship only with my partner and nobody else in it. This makes it more difficult. Socialization is for children, in my opinion, and I only want social interactions with a partner and not with a group of people (like i did as a kid).