I turn 30 in a week. I didn't work hard and neither did I have fun. The things I wanted to do like get in relationships or have a close knit friend circle never

I turn 30 in a week. I didn't work hard and neither did I have fun. The things I wanted to do like get in relationships or have a close knit friend circle never worked out because I just didn't have the people skills to make it happen. My 20s were wasted in nursing my own bruised ego and running behind people who didn't care about me. Neither did I work hard and make something of myself as a career. Most of my time was spent on half finished projects and playing games or Netflix. I maybe had two good years in all my 20s. I wouldn't say it was a complete waste because I at least realized what I was doing wrong but then a part of me also thinks I should had the wisdom earlier so that it could have been better. So overall, I just went through my 20s on autopilot. I couldn't do the things I wanted to do and I what I could do I didn't want to. I felt like I had no choice in my happiness. I was doing things that I thought I should be doing to live up to other people's standards instead of what I really wanted to do...if that makes sense. Now that I'm older, I have decided that I'm not the ambitious type and all I want to do is to chill and have enough money to not live paycheck to paycheck. The rat race is for the birds.