https://local.theonion.com/8-4-million-new-yorkers-suddenly-realize-new-york-city-1819571723 https://local.theonion.com/8-4-million-new-yorkers-suddenly-... At

https://local.theonion.com/8-4-million-new-yorkers-suddenly-realize-new-york-city-1819571723 https://local.theonion.com/8-4-million-new-yorkers-suddenly-... At 4:32 p.m. Tuesday, every single resident of New York City decided to evacuate the famed metropolis, having realized it was nothing more than a massive, trash-ridden hellhole that slowly sucks the life out of every one of its inhabitants.