5 ms·

I live in Cambridge and its perfect for my needs, for now. Small university town, everything at bikeable distance, cosmopolitan: if I want to meet a person from

I live in Cambridge and its perfect for my needs, for now. Small university town, everything at bikeable distance, cosmopolitan: if I want to meet a person from any country or experience their cuisine, eveything is available here. London is just an hour away by train. And companies like Microsoft, Apple and IBM have their offices here. The only problem is that in UK its extremely hard to get a sense of community and make new friends - especially with the native Brits, who prefer to be aloof and not really interested in connecting beyond the surface

christkv 6y ago
I found my shared like of British humour and sarcastic outlook of life made it easy to make British friends when I lived there.
- neoplatonian 6y ago
  I love British humor as well! I must admit, if one drinks (I don't), it must be easier. Also, being "white" helps, I think.
  - robocat 6y ago
    > if one drinks, it must be easier I don’t think you are missing out, since in my experience you usually only find “pub” friends to drink with, who often have unhealthy drinking habits and don’t become actual friends (albeit I’m faux British: in New Zealand!). Any activity (sport, hobby, work) where you hang with locals gives you the chance to make healthier relationships. For anyone looking to make friends in a pub, you want to find a pub that is social. Some signals to look for: (a) a very wide range of ages that go there, (b) casual drinkers who are there to socialise rather than get drunk, (c) a single woman can drink at the pub comfortably without getting hit on, (d) not heaving full but rarely empty, (e) no loud music - or even better no music - if any live music it is quiet enough to talk over, (f) not a “popular“ place but a place for locals, and (g) it “feels” like someone’s house rather than a bar. That style of pub is dissapearing, and they are hard to find in large cities, but they do exist and they have a completely different culture. Edit: if anyone from the Isles can comment on their take on this, I would appreciate it.
    - deleted 6y ago
      [deleted]
    - plplok 6y ago
      any recommendations?
      - heavenlyblue 6y ago
        Skehans in London
  - leonroy 6y ago
    > if one drinks (I don't), it must be easier. True in the past, but a non-issue these days, especially with younger colleagues. > Also, being "white" helps, I think Maybe in very provincial communities in parts of the country but not in the major cities - at least not since the 90s onwards. If anything I'd say the UK is one of the more open minded countries I've seen.
    - deleted 6y ago
      [deleted]
  - christkv 6y ago
    Another thing I just remembered. The British have a great love for volunteering. I had a friend who moved to St Albans due to work and volunteered at the de Havilland air craft museum and got good friends of all age groups in the area from that and got to help out on restoring planes.
chrisseaton 6y ago
Shame it's so astronomically expensive. I don't think I could ever afford a nice family house there. Don't really understand where all the lecturers and tech workers live.
- neoplatonian 6y ago
  True! I think it gets inexpensive very rapidly as one moves away from the centre - and thats where most workers live. I am single so I can afford living near the centre for now.
timthorn 6y ago
I found that when I first moved to the area, but it's not too hard to get involved with groups like Makespace, Cambridge Wireless or Cambridge Network, CSAR or the Centre for Computing History to expand your circle.
PaulDavisThe1st 6y ago
I lived in Cambridge for 18 months in 1987-88. You should be very very glad of the tech companies there, because there's now a community to be a part of that isn't the university. When I was there (working for Schlumberger out on Madingley Road), there was almost nothing happening in town that wasn't university-related, and if you didn't have an inside connection, you weren't a part of it. I have a sort-of-cousin who lives there now, and he loves it , though he did find a way into the university crowd anyway.

christkv 6y ago

I found my shared like of British humour and sarcastic outlook of life made it easy to make British friends when I lived there.

neoplatonian 6y ago
I love British humor as well! I must admit, if one drinks (I don't), it must be easier. Also, being "white" helps, I think.
- robocat 6y ago
  > if one drinks, it must be easier I don’t think you are missing out, since in my experience you usually only find “pub” friends to drink with, who often have unhealthy drinking habits and don’t become actual friends (albeit I’m faux British: in New Zealand!). Any activity (sport, hobby, work) where you hang with locals gives you the chance to make healthier relationships. For anyone looking to make friends in a pub, you want to find a pub that is social. Some signals to look for: (a) a very wide range of ages that go there, (b) casual drinkers who are there to socialise rather than get drunk, (c) a single woman can drink at the pub comfortably without getting hit on, (d) not heaving full but rarely empty, (e) no loud music - or even better no music - if any live music it is quiet enough to talk over, (f) not a “popular“ place but a place for locals, and (g) it “feels” like someone’s house rather than a bar. That style of pub is dissapearing, and they are hard to find in large cities, but they do exist and they have a completely different culture. Edit: if anyone from the Isles can comment on their take on this, I would appreciate it.
  - deleted 6y ago
    [deleted]
  - plplok 6y ago
    any recommendations?
    - heavenlyblue 6y ago
      Skehans in London
- leonroy 6y ago
  > if one drinks (I don't), it must be easier. True in the past, but a non-issue these days, especially with younger colleagues. > Also, being "white" helps, I think Maybe in very provincial communities in parts of the country but not in the major cities - at least not since the 90s onwards. If anything I'd say the UK is one of the more open minded countries I've seen.
  - deleted 6y ago
    [deleted]
- christkv 6y ago
  Another thing I just remembered. The British have a great love for volunteering. I had a friend who moved to St Albans due to work and volunteered at the de Havilland air craft museum and got good friends of all age groups in the area from that and got to help out on restoring planes.

chrisseaton 6y ago

Shame it's so astronomically expensive. I don't think I could ever afford a nice family house there. Don't really understand where all the lecturers and tech workers live.

neoplatonian 6y ago
True! I think it gets inexpensive very rapidly as one moves away from the centre - and thats where most workers live. I am single so I can afford living near the centre for now.

timthorn 6y ago

I found that when I first moved to the area, but it's not too hard to get involved with groups like Makespace, Cambridge Wireless or Cambridge Network, CSAR or the Centre for Computing History to expand your circle.

PaulDavisThe1st 6y ago

I lived in Cambridge for 18 months in 1987-88. You should be very very glad of the tech companies there, because there's now a community to be a part of that isn't the university. When I was there (working for Schlumberger out on Madingley Road), there was almost nothing happening in town that wasn't university-related, and if you didn't have an inside connection, you weren't a part of it. I have a sort-of-cousin who lives there now, and he loves it , though he did find a way into the university crowd anyway.