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So I imagine there's a lot of people here that don't know Couchsurfing or what the big deal is. Couchsurfing has been one of the most important things in my lif

So I imagine there's a lot of people here that don't know Couchsurfing or what the big deal is. Couchsurfing has been one of the most important things in my life, so I'll do my best to explain why it's so special. The basic idea is you stay at a stranger's place, or you host a stranger at yours - completely for free, no money involved. Everyone does it differently. Some people plan their trip meticulously months in advance and give arrival times to the minute, while others send a message at 9pm the same night asking if you're free. Some people ask to stay one night, some three, some far more; some bring bags of delicious food and artwork of their culture and some bring nothing. I mostly host, and I've had all of the above - and then some. You have an incredibly diverse group of people. I've met artists, musicians, dancers - everyone from a Syrian man who lived under ISIS for years to an evangelical Christian woman who wanted to try shrooms. The beautiful thing is that it's anything you want it to be. People have profiles that are often filled out with a good amount of detail (I usually skip the skimpy profiles) so you can pick out whoever or whatever you want. You want a pastry chef? You want a violinist? You want an architect? You want someone tidy and on-time or a hitchhiking hippie? Simply search for one to host or stay with. The friendships and relationships I've made through Couchsurfing have been some of the best and most interesting I could have asked for. And the best part - you can do it all from home, traveling the world from the comfort of your couch. Anyway, that's the beauty of it. I really hope that the network of people can be saved. Long term, I think it can, with something like BeWelcome, but of course it's a network effect problem - no hosts=no guests. If anyone is curious about Couchsurfing (or wants to couchsurf my boat in the Netherlands - seriously, anyone is welcome, please come!) then feel free to send me an email (it's in my profile.)

morganherlocker 6y ago
I had a similar experience with the couchsurfing community 6 or 7 years ago. Beyond the basic hosting concept, there was also a large group of people who would meet up regularly in my city, which made it really easy to find activities for the guests you had in town. I really hope they find a way to keep going.
alexashka 6y ago
Thanks for sharing. Couchsurfing is so interesting. Its success relies on it never becoming mainstream. It's like those word-of-mouth-only parties that are so great but if enough people hear about them, they are no longer any good. I had a similar experience with drum circles in Toronto, Canada. They were this hippie heaven of people coming together in a park and playing drums once a week in the summertime. Other people would come by and picnic, sit around, dance, hula hoop, whatever. Once it got popular enough, the park would be littered by the end of the day, so local residents complained and got drum circles banned, so we don't have drum circles anymore, because they were too good and a complete non-profit :)
- brendyn 6y ago
  Is that really the case? I couch surfed years ago. From memory I think couchsurfing.com has a reputation system where if people stay at your house, you gain points that give you priority when staying with someone else. so it's kinda like a system for bypassing money in exchanging accommodation. Ideally, if many people start swarming the system looking for free places to stay, it will just mean they won't get chosen, and things keep operating as normal.
  - em-bee 6y ago
    relying on the reputation system to filter out bad guests means that new members have no chance to join. hosts will be overwhelmed with requests. many guests will be freeloaders who would be better served with airbnb. for the site to work, the influx of new members needd to be small enough so that the community csn handle it. word of mouth is the only way to make sure that new members can get a reference before their first trip.
    - bacon_waffle 6y ago
      Like the poster you're responding to, I haven't used couchsurfing in a few years - left due to life changes, and being annoyed by earlier stages of the commercialization that the article talks about. But, prior to that I semi-regularly hosted and used it in my own travels a couple times, over maybe 8 or 9 years and a few countries. It worked very much as described in that post, and didn't seem to have the problems listed in yours. The biggest problem I remember with CS, was people trying to inappropriately use it to get laid.
joshfraser 6y ago
Couchsurfing has had an incredibly positive impact on my life as well. I've made a lot of lifelong friends and learned a lot about the world and different cultures through the people I've met. The app is atrocious and barely usable, but the community is terrific. More than anything, Couchsurfing taught me wonderful things can happen when you embrace serendipity. Couchsurfing is an important antidote to a world that seems increasingly fearful of strangers. I hope they manage to survive.
- owenversteeg 6y ago
  Yeah, that's the really wonderful thing about Couchsurfing. It's a whole web of beautiful trust. People in the first world are scared of strangers by default: Couchsurfing flips that on its head. Although I still try to stay safe, I now generally trust strangers and it's made my life so much richer. Paradoxically, trusting strangers has also made my life safer. In Armenia, I met an old woman who then helped me get through a dangerous area and told me not to worry - she'd protect me like her own grandson :) In another country, I made friends with an army officer who watched over me, and somewhere else a truck driver helped me through a tough border crossing. People also seem to be scared of that one crazy person who'll stab or rob them. Here's one thing I realized: even the "bad" members of society are not bad to everyone. A mugger doesn't mug his friends and many murderers have been loving parents. Getting to know someone - aside from being interesting - means they'll see you as another human being, not some target. (Most of the time. Of course, always use your judgment, and if something feels off, just leave.) I hope CS gets reborn. Who knows, it might happen - maybe they'll run out of cash, put the site up for sale, and someone will rebuild it as it should be. Or maybe the current leadership will do a 180 (unlikely, but who knows!)
  - peterburkimsher 6y ago
    The community is already coming together to rebuild. The CS meetup in Auckland is rebranding as BeWelcome. Kaohsiung is discussing it. I'm sad that all those good memories will be tinged with pain by this betrayal, but it's given me a good reason to get back in touch with old friends, and invite them to BW. I wholeheartedly agree with your descriptions of CS and trusting strangers; you've had some great stories!
danicgross 6y ago
The cross-pollination effect of Couchsurfing is so powerful. I often wonder — how could you create a digital equivalent of this? We let strangers into our homes, but not into our superuser shell. Why?
- FartyMcFarter 6y ago
  It's harder to pretend you're a human in physical form than in digital form?
  - FartyMcFarter 6y ago
    Furthermore, there's more law enforcement on physical crimes than digital crimes.
    - lotsofpulp 6y ago
      In some ways. In other ways, everything on a computer can and might be recorded so it’s prudent to stay away from borderline illegal or inappropriate things if it can come back to you.
nroets 6y ago
I used Couch Surfing thought-out the world. In China and Vietnam, I found that the locals use the site only to meet foreigners. For example an teacher in Vietnam asked me to be a guest during an English class. I traveled by bicycle. This meant I could use also the Warm Showers website. This worked extremely well in Europe and the US. I had wonderful hosts in New York City, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Bavaria, Zurich, Washington DC, Berlin, Czech Republic, Dallas, Houston, Baton Rouge. And in the Netherlands I used Vrienden Op De Fiets, which is more expensive, but also very nice.
- mierz00 6y ago
  Hah! I had the same experience in Vietnam. It was in Hanoi and I had such a blast. The students of the class took me around and showed me places for the rest of the week.
- deleted 6y ago
  [deleted]
stormdennis 6y ago
Have there been any cases where something bad has happened to either a host or a guest? (Such are the thoughts that consume my middle aged mind, I think I was more trusting when younger but never to the extent that you are). BTW, I think your attitude is great.
- joshvm 6y ago
  Sure, this does happen, but it's very rare. Anecdotally the most common issue is non-violent sexual assault - e.g. guys hitting on girls. That's largely a risk for solo female travelers unfortunately. If you travel as a couple, for example, the risk is far less. On the other hand the vast majority of solo travelers, male and female, don't have any issues. There are some safety nets in place, like you can get verified by couchsurfing for a small fee. It's a trust system, people are encouraged to vouch for each other. If you're worried, then only visit/host people who have a lot of good reviews, or who can be vouched for by someone else in the community. If you were asking from the perspective of a prospective traveler I would suggest going to local couchsurfing meetups rather than randomly finding people to stay with. Often you can get recommendations directly and gut feel is very valuable.
  - eanzenberg 6y ago
    Guys hitting on girls is sexual assault now?
    - cpach 6y ago
      No. But if you host on CS in order to make advances towards women, that is creepy behavior and not what the site is intended for. If you want to get laid, use Tinder etc. instead.
      - toxik 6y ago
        A girl I met on Tinder used CS to find interesting people and have sex with them. It seems like something men and women have been denying but engaging in for centuries.
owenversteeg 6y ago
I'm so glad this comment is getting so much attention because Couchsurfing really is one of the best things to ever happen to me - not only with all the incredible experiences but also because it made me a kinder, more trusting and better person. Really, Couchsurfing changed my life. Ignore the fact that the app is a dumpster fire and just give it a shot - or better, try BeWelcome or Trustroots. And again, if anyone has any questions about Couchsurfing or wants to start but is confused (or wants to couchsurf my boat!) please send me an email (it's in my profile.)
- blaser-waffle 6y ago
  +1 for providing other options. Never heard of BeWelcome or Trustroots.
fxtentacle 6y ago
Oddly enough, your experience with CouchSurfing very much matches my initial experience with AirBnb, back in the days when they were still small. My experience with CouchSurfing, on the other hand, was weird. When me and my roommates (3 guys, 2 girls) signed up our shared house (in waking distance of a touristic city center), we were expecting to see lots of backpackers and tourists our age. Instead, most of our guest requests were middle-aged women with a strong urge to point out how adventurous they were feeling. I believe we not once had a guest request from a guy.
- skrebbel 6y ago
  Wasn't the initial Airbnb pitch "like couchsurfing, but with money"?
- owenversteeg 6y ago
  That is indeed very unusual, I've never heard of an experience like that! I wonder what happened, maybe they were all part of a group or something? Middle aged women make up a very small percentage of Couchsurfing, and when I see them they're usually hosts only. I get a ton of requests, and I think it'd be more likely for me to get a message from an astronaut than two middle aged women. I just checked my references and my friends' references and didn't find one woman over 40. I really wonder what happened in your case!
  - fxtentacle 6y ago
    Did you ever actually meet an astronaut through couchsurfing? The weirdest stay-over that I ever had was a Korean religious pilgrimage who mistook me for a monk because apparently one had lived in my apartment before I moved in.
    - welly 6y ago
      Not an astronaut but a couple who had been working on the Antarctic (he was a driver, she was working in the kitchens/cafe/bar) during the summer season. They had loads of really interesting stories and it sounded fascinating. They'd talked about how those who had done the winter season (24 hours of pitch blackness for 4 months) were all a little bit on edge and twitchy.
licebmi__at__ 6y ago
All my experiences with couchsurfing were on the weird side, as a friend, friendly but serious kind of guy who is a weirdo magnet published the home we were renting together. We had an artist which might had a mental issue or maybe just acting as he constantly confused who we were and told the same histories again and again. Some guy who in his own words, was trying to start his own religious cult. And some guy who brought a lot of peyote and blow the kitchen trying to destilate the mescaline. Those were pretty interesting times, I definitely appreciate the experiences I had, but I also don't think I host anybody now (or at least not until my son is older).
mbdesign 6y ago
Just as a note, the link in your profile to your CSS framework seems incorrect. Groeten!
- owenversteeg 6y ago
  Fixed! Bedankt :)
gerbler 6y ago
Couchsurfing was such a magical experience for me. I was a bit lonely in a new city and went along to a party hosted by another CouchSurfing host. I made two lifelong friends and got to know another wonderful group of creative & kind people. I probably hosted 10 times and stayed with people about the same. Each time it was such a wonderful experience - by far the best way of traveling when I was in my 20s. Truly an amazing exercise in trust, as well as building experience of the kindness of strangers (with memorable adventures).
- owenversteeg 6y ago
  Aw, that's so great! It really warms my heart to hear about all the magical Couchsurfing experiences everyone's had. The kindness of strangers is such an amazing thing, isn't it?
hoseja 6y ago
It's mostly a sex thing though, no? I can't imagine it isn't.
- 00deadbeef 6y ago
  Some people abuse it and try and get sex but it’s not the norm. It’s far easier to find sex on one of the many apps designed for that.
- baddestpoet 6y ago
  Not at all, it's really about meeting people.
  - globular-toast 6y ago
    Tinder and Grindr are also about "meeting people".
    - 00deadbeef 6y ago
      Yes and both are more specific about the type of meets. Grindr even has fields for your sexual preferences.
      - globular-toast 6y ago
        The number of sexual relationships that start off with the explicit intention of being sexual are vanishingly small. Grindr is an exception because it's aimed at gay men. Most other platforms provide at least a small amount of reasonable doubt. On Tinder you merely select which demographics you are "interested in". There is absolutely no mention of sex or sexual preferences on the app. And Tinder is considered one of the more obvious ones. If Couchsurfing was truly about meeting people then the profiles wouldn't have gender and age on them. But they do.
        hombre_fatal 6y ago
        Well said. The whole gambit of sex is that you have to suss it out from each other with tact and awareness without either person being explicit about it -- hell, even on a taxi ride to a motel to do the damn act. That means that it's always potentially on the table any time you have human connection going on, couchsurfing included. Nothing about couchsurfing means this isn't happening or shouldn't be happening. It's just part of life and human connection. After reading these comments, I do think that the miscommunication here is a lack of shared understanding of what flirting is. I presume some people's imaginations immediately go to a host making guests uncomfortable by laying unwanted attention on thick, like the stereotype of the guy coming out in a short robe and hiking his leg up on the arm of the couch. But I would like people who imagine that to know that most flirting lives in the banter area where both people are having a good time.
mnky9800n 6y ago
Every woman I've met on couch surfing has been a victim of some kind of sexual harassment or violence due to someone they meet on couchsurfing. Basically they stay with a guy and he has expectations and is vocal if not forceful about it. Women would be surprised that I had a bed just for them, didn't expect them to sleep with me, didn't ask them for sex, etc. I hosted for two years living in Berlin. That being said I also had some amazing experiences through couchsurfing.
- welly 6y ago
  I used to be very involved with couchsurfing in the late 2000s and early 2010s I had a high number of women couchsurfers, which came about from having positive feedback from other female couchsurfers, because like you they had their own bed and I wasn't trying to have sex with them. It started being a concern because I began to think that people looking at my profile would assume that I was just looking to host women which wasn't the case at all. But from speaking to my guests, they said they chose me to host them because of the positive feedback from other female couchsurfers. I do miss couchsurfing, I met some great and interesting people and have been thinking about getting back into it but have concerns about the direction couchsurfing has gone. I now live on a narrowboat on the canals in the UK and I think it'd make an interesting place for couchsurfers to stay.
  - dkersten 6y ago
    I hosted a lot of people in summer of 2008. All of my housemates were into couchsurfing too (mixed gender house: two guys and three girls, that probably helped), so there was a period where we always hosted at least one person. One weekend, for a couchsurfing event in my city, we hosted 12 people at once! We eventually stopped hosting because people got busy and priorities changed, but our experience as hosts was very positive and I still attended local couchsurfing meetups for the next year or so. I made many friends and contacts through it. We never received any negative feedback and were in high demand. Aside from that one super busy weekend, where things did get a bit cramped (but people knew in advance that it would be), nobody shared any beds or couches and couchsurfers had rooms separate from the hosts. I wouldn’t have had it any other way. Sharing beds with the host is... creepy (unless the person was given their own bed/couch and they mutually decided they wanted to share a bed, of course). I miss couchsurfing too. I stopped being part of it around the time it got a sense for being a bit commercial. My circle of couchsurfing friends did it for the cultural exchange and at some point it drifted from that to just free accommodation and drinking parties. At least that’s the sense I got.
yoricm 6y ago
I love reading about your enthusiasm for Couchsurfing and your philosophy that comes with it. You should write a book. I'd love reading real stories, along with some reflections. It sounds like a nice way to meet people as they are. Authenticity is scarce and we need it.
namdnay 6y ago
I had some really good experiences on couchsurfing (hosting and surfing) about 10 years ago, then I moved to a very touristic part of the world, and started getting 90% of requests from couples who were basically looking to get free accommodation for their holidays. I accepted the first 3 times, and each time they would arrive in the evening, unpack, drive to a restaurant they had already booked, come back to sleep and then leave first thing in the morning.
- pelario 6y ago
  A key technique to avoid those situations was the "poisoned pill": buried in your profile there is some keyword they must include in their request. With that (which I copied once I was reading a full descriptive profile) you get a great filter. I have done a good share of CS, both as host and guest, over the last ~10 years, having either good or amazing experiences.
  - namdnay 6y ago
    Ah very clever!
  - teddyh 6y ago
    That’s a “brown M&M”, not a “poison pill”.
    - blaser-waffle 6y ago
      Yeah phrasing it that way -- poison pill -- is a good way to make people feel uneasy when you're staying with them.
      - vorpalhex 6y ago
        It would explain why they kept going out to restaurants instead of eating anything at the house...
  - dbancajas 6y ago
    > ading a full descriptive profile) you get a great filter. I have done a good can you explain? what keywords do you have to put to avoid this?
maram 6y ago
I knew about Couchsurfing because my previous startup was in the rental marketplace. Although, I never tried it..I heard many good things about it. I also noticed Travis Kalanick used it as a title “couchsurfing” in one of his blogs before he launched Uber. https://swooshing.wordpress.com/?s=Jam+pad+&submit=Search https://swooshing.wordpress.com/?s=Jam+pad+&submit=Search
globular-toast 6y ago
I'm curious. What percentage of female surfers did you sleep with?
learnstats2 6y ago
This article is about the business CouchSurfing rather than the action of couch surfing.
mycall 6y ago
I was thinking about hosting on my boat too but I thought risky. Any pro tips?
simonebrunozzi 6y ago
Great comment. I've used couchsurfing in 2008-2009 a bit, but never to stay - just to meet local people when I was traveling for work in foreign places. The weird thing is, AirBnB came along, and I keep reading the sentence "nobody believed that hosting a stranger at home would work", which made me internally scream "but there's couchsurfing!!". In fact, I think that Couchsurfing (the website/company) had a chance to become like AirBnB. They didn't. Maybe intentionally.

morganherlocker 6y ago

I had a similar experience with the couchsurfing community 6 or 7 years ago. Beyond the basic hosting concept, there was also a large group of people who would meet up regularly in my city, which made it really easy to find activities for the guests you had in town. I really hope they find a way to keep going.

alexashka 6y ago

Thanks for sharing. Couchsurfing is so interesting. Its success relies on it never becoming mainstream. It's like those word-of-mouth-only parties that are so great but if enough people hear about them, they are no longer any good. I had a similar experience with drum circles in Toronto, Canada. They were this hippie heaven of people coming together in a park and playing drums once a week in the summertime. Other people would come by and picnic, sit around, dance, hula hoop, whatever. Once it got popular enough, the park would be littered by the end of the day, so local residents complained and got drum circles banned, so we don't have drum circles anymore, because they were too good and a complete non-profit :)

brendyn 6y ago
Is that really the case? I couch surfed years ago. From memory I think couchsurfing.com has a reputation system where if people stay at your house, you gain points that give you priority when staying with someone else. so it's kinda like a system for bypassing money in exchanging accommodation. Ideally, if many people start swarming the system looking for free places to stay, it will just mean they won't get chosen, and things keep operating as normal.
- em-bee 6y ago
  relying on the reputation system to filter out bad guests means that new members have no chance to join. hosts will be overwhelmed with requests. many guests will be freeloaders who would be better served with airbnb. for the site to work, the influx of new members needd to be small enough so that the community csn handle it. word of mouth is the only way to make sure that new members can get a reference before their first trip.
  - bacon_waffle 6y ago
    Like the poster you're responding to, I haven't used couchsurfing in a few years - left due to life changes, and being annoyed by earlier stages of the commercialization that the article talks about. But, prior to that I semi-regularly hosted and used it in my own travels a couple times, over maybe 8 or 9 years and a few countries. It worked very much as described in that post, and didn't seem to have the problems listed in yours. The biggest problem I remember with CS, was people trying to inappropriately use it to get laid.

joshfraser 6y ago

Couchsurfing has had an incredibly positive impact on my life as well. I've made a lot of lifelong friends and learned a lot about the world and different cultures through the people I've met. The app is atrocious and barely usable, but the community is terrific. More than anything, Couchsurfing taught me wonderful things can happen when you embrace serendipity. Couchsurfing is an important antidote to a world that seems increasingly fearful of strangers. I hope they manage to survive.

owenversteeg 6y ago
Yeah, that's the really wonderful thing about Couchsurfing. It's a whole web of beautiful trust. People in the first world are scared of strangers by default: Couchsurfing flips that on its head. Although I still try to stay safe, I now generally trust strangers and it's made my life so much richer. Paradoxically, trusting strangers has also made my life safer. In Armenia, I met an old woman who then helped me get through a dangerous area and told me not to worry - she'd protect me like her own grandson :) In another country, I made friends with an army officer who watched over me, and somewhere else a truck driver helped me through a tough border crossing. People also seem to be scared of that one crazy person who'll stab or rob them. Here's one thing I realized: even the "bad" members of society are not bad to everyone. A mugger doesn't mug his friends and many murderers have been loving parents. Getting to know someone - aside from being interesting - means they'll see you as another human being, not some target. (Most of the time. Of course, always use your judgment, and if something feels off, just leave.) I hope CS gets reborn. Who knows, it might happen - maybe they'll run out of cash, put the site up for sale, and someone will rebuild it as it should be. Or maybe the current leadership will do a 180 (unlikely, but who knows!)
- peterburkimsher 6y ago
  The community is already coming together to rebuild. The CS meetup in Auckland is rebranding as BeWelcome. Kaohsiung is discussing it. I'm sad that all those good memories will be tinged with pain by this betrayal, but it's given me a good reason to get back in touch with old friends, and invite them to BW. I wholeheartedly agree with your descriptions of CS and trusting strangers; you've had some great stories!

danicgross 6y ago

The cross-pollination effect of Couchsurfing is so powerful. I often wonder — how could you create a digital equivalent of this? We let strangers into our homes, but not into our superuser shell. Why?

FartyMcFarter 6y ago
It's harder to pretend you're a human in physical form than in digital form?
- FartyMcFarter 6y ago
  Furthermore, there's more law enforcement on physical crimes than digital crimes.
  - lotsofpulp 6y ago
    In some ways. In other ways, everything on a computer can and might be recorded so it’s prudent to stay away from borderline illegal or inappropriate things if it can come back to you.

nroets 6y ago

I used Couch Surfing thought-out the world. In China and Vietnam, I found that the locals use the site only to meet foreigners. For example an teacher in Vietnam asked me to be a guest during an English class. I traveled by bicycle. This meant I could use also the Warm Showers website. This worked extremely well in Europe and the US. I had wonderful hosts in New York City, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Bavaria, Zurich, Washington DC, Berlin, Czech Republic, Dallas, Houston, Baton Rouge. And in the Netherlands I used Vrienden Op De Fiets, which is more expensive, but also very nice.

mierz00 6y ago
Hah! I had the same experience in Vietnam. It was in Hanoi and I had such a blast. The students of the class took me around and showed me places for the rest of the week.
deleted 6y ago
[deleted]

stormdennis 6y ago

Have there been any cases where something bad has happened to either a host or a guest? (Such are the thoughts that consume my middle aged mind, I think I was more trusting when younger but never to the extent that you are). BTW, I think your attitude is great.

joshvm 6y ago
Sure, this does happen, but it's very rare. Anecdotally the most common issue is non-violent sexual assault - e.g. guys hitting on girls. That's largely a risk for solo female travelers unfortunately. If you travel as a couple, for example, the risk is far less. On the other hand the vast majority of solo travelers, male and female, don't have any issues. There are some safety nets in place, like you can get verified by couchsurfing for a small fee. It's a trust system, people are encouraged to vouch for each other. If you're worried, then only visit/host people who have a lot of good reviews, or who can be vouched for by someone else in the community. If you were asking from the perspective of a prospective traveler I would suggest going to local couchsurfing meetups rather than randomly finding people to stay with. Often you can get recommendations directly and gut feel is very valuable.
- eanzenberg 6y ago
  Guys hitting on girls is sexual assault now?
  - cpach 6y ago
    No. But if you host on CS in order to make advances towards women, that is creepy behavior and not what the site is intended for. If you want to get laid, use Tinder etc. instead.
    - toxik 6y ago
      A girl I met on Tinder used CS to find interesting people and have sex with them. It seems like something men and women have been denying but engaging in for centuries.

owenversteeg 6y ago

I'm so glad this comment is getting so much attention because Couchsurfing really is one of the best things to ever happen to me - not only with all the incredible experiences but also because it made me a kinder, more trusting and better person. Really, Couchsurfing changed my life. Ignore the fact that the app is a dumpster fire and just give it a shot - or better, try BeWelcome or Trustroots. And again, if anyone has any questions about Couchsurfing or wants to start but is confused (or wants to couchsurf my boat!) please send me an email (it's in my profile.)

blaser-waffle 6y ago
+1 for providing other options. Never heard of BeWelcome or Trustroots.

fxtentacle 6y ago

Oddly enough, your experience with CouchSurfing very much matches my initial experience with AirBnb, back in the days when they were still small. My experience with CouchSurfing, on the other hand, was weird. When me and my roommates (3 guys, 2 girls) signed up our shared house (in waking distance of a touristic city center), we were expecting to see lots of backpackers and tourists our age. Instead, most of our guest requests were middle-aged women with a strong urge to point out how adventurous they were feeling. I believe we not once had a guest request from a guy.

skrebbel 6y ago
Wasn't the initial Airbnb pitch "like couchsurfing, but with money"?
owenversteeg 6y ago
That is indeed very unusual, I've never heard of an experience like that! I wonder what happened, maybe they were all part of a group or something? Middle aged women make up a very small percentage of Couchsurfing, and when I see them they're usually hosts only. I get a ton of requests, and I think it'd be more likely for me to get a message from an astronaut than two middle aged women. I just checked my references and my friends' references and didn't find one woman over 40. I really wonder what happened in your case!
- fxtentacle 6y ago
  Did you ever actually meet an astronaut through couchsurfing? The weirdest stay-over that I ever had was a Korean religious pilgrimage who mistook me for a monk because apparently one had lived in my apartment before I moved in.
  - welly 6y ago
    Not an astronaut but a couple who had been working on the Antarctic (he was a driver, she was working in the kitchens/cafe/bar) during the summer season. They had loads of really interesting stories and it sounded fascinating. They'd talked about how those who had done the winter season (24 hours of pitch blackness for 4 months) were all a little bit on edge and twitchy.

licebmi__at__ 6y ago

All my experiences with couchsurfing were on the weird side, as a friend, friendly but serious kind of guy who is a weirdo magnet published the home we were renting together. We had an artist which might had a mental issue or maybe just acting as he constantly confused who we were and told the same histories again and again. Some guy who in his own words, was trying to start his own religious cult. And some guy who brought a lot of peyote and blow the kitchen trying to destilate the mescaline. Those were pretty interesting times, I definitely appreciate the experiences I had, but I also don't think I host anybody now (or at least not until my son is older).

mbdesign 6y ago

Just as a note, the link in your profile to your CSS framework seems incorrect. Groeten!

owenversteeg 6y ago
Fixed! Bedankt :)

gerbler 6y ago

Couchsurfing was such a magical experience for me. I was a bit lonely in a new city and went along to a party hosted by another CouchSurfing host. I made two lifelong friends and got to know another wonderful group of creative & kind people. I probably hosted 10 times and stayed with people about the same. Each time it was such a wonderful experience - by far the best way of traveling when I was in my 20s. Truly an amazing exercise in trust, as well as building experience of the kindness of strangers (with memorable adventures).

owenversteeg 6y ago
Aw, that's so great! It really warms my heart to hear about all the magical Couchsurfing experiences everyone's had. The kindness of strangers is such an amazing thing, isn't it?

hoseja 6y ago

It's mostly a sex thing though, no? I can't imagine it isn't.

00deadbeef 6y ago
Some people abuse it and try and get sex but it’s not the norm. It’s far easier to find sex on one of the many apps designed for that.
baddestpoet 6y ago
Not at all, it's really about meeting people.
- globular-toast 6y ago
  Tinder and Grindr are also about "meeting people".
  - 00deadbeef 6y ago
    Yes and both are more specific about the type of meets. Grindr even has fields for your sexual preferences.
    - globular-toast 6y ago
      The number of sexual relationships that start off with the explicit intention of being sexual are vanishingly small. Grindr is an exception because it's aimed at gay men. Most other platforms provide at least a small amount of reasonable doubt. On Tinder you merely select which demographics you are "interested in". There is absolutely no mention of sex or sexual preferences on the app. And Tinder is considered one of the more obvious ones. If Couchsurfing was truly about meeting people then the profiles wouldn't have gender and age on them. But they do.
      - hombre_fatal 6y ago
        Well said. The whole gambit of sex is that you have to suss it out from each other with tact and awareness without either person being explicit about it -- hell, even on a taxi ride to a motel to do the damn act. That means that it's always potentially on the table any time you have human connection going on, couchsurfing included. Nothing about couchsurfing means this isn't happening or shouldn't be happening. It's just part of life and human connection. After reading these comments, I do think that the miscommunication here is a lack of shared understanding of what flirting is. I presume some people's imaginations immediately go to a host making guests uncomfortable by laying unwanted attention on thick, like the stereotype of the guy coming out in a short robe and hiking his leg up on the arm of the couch. But I would like people who imagine that to know that most flirting lives in the banter area where both people are having a good time.

mnky9800n 6y ago

Every woman I've met on couch surfing has been a victim of some kind of sexual harassment or violence due to someone they meet on couchsurfing. Basically they stay with a guy and he has expectations and is vocal if not forceful about it. Women would be surprised that I had a bed just for them, didn't expect them to sleep with me, didn't ask them for sex, etc. I hosted for two years living in Berlin. That being said I also had some amazing experiences through couchsurfing.

welly 6y ago
I used to be very involved with couchsurfing in the late 2000s and early 2010s I had a high number of women couchsurfers, which came about from having positive feedback from other female couchsurfers, because like you they had their own bed and I wasn't trying to have sex with them. It started being a concern because I began to think that people looking at my profile would assume that I was just looking to host women which wasn't the case at all. But from speaking to my guests, they said they chose me to host them because of the positive feedback from other female couchsurfers. I do miss couchsurfing, I met some great and interesting people and have been thinking about getting back into it but have concerns about the direction couchsurfing has gone. I now live on a narrowboat on the canals in the UK and I think it'd make an interesting place for couchsurfers to stay.
- dkersten 6y ago
  I hosted a lot of people in summer of 2008. All of my housemates were into couchsurfing too (mixed gender house: two guys and three girls, that probably helped), so there was a period where we always hosted at least one person. One weekend, for a couchsurfing event in my city, we hosted 12 people at once! We eventually stopped hosting because people got busy and priorities changed, but our experience as hosts was very positive and I still attended local couchsurfing meetups for the next year or so. I made many friends and contacts through it. We never received any negative feedback and were in high demand. Aside from that one super busy weekend, where things did get a bit cramped (but people knew in advance that it would be), nobody shared any beds or couches and couchsurfers had rooms separate from the hosts. I wouldn’t have had it any other way. Sharing beds with the host is... creepy (unless the person was given their own bed/couch and they mutually decided they wanted to share a bed, of course). I miss couchsurfing too. I stopped being part of it around the time it got a sense for being a bit commercial. My circle of couchsurfing friends did it for the cultural exchange and at some point it drifted from that to just free accommodation and drinking parties. At least that’s the sense I got.

yoricm 6y ago

I love reading about your enthusiasm for Couchsurfing and your philosophy that comes with it. You should write a book. I'd love reading real stories, along with some reflections. It sounds like a nice way to meet people as they are. Authenticity is scarce and we need it.

namdnay 6y ago

I had some really good experiences on couchsurfing (hosting and surfing) about 10 years ago, then I moved to a very touristic part of the world, and started getting 90% of requests from couples who were basically looking to get free accommodation for their holidays. I accepted the first 3 times, and each time they would arrive in the evening, unpack, drive to a restaurant they had already booked, come back to sleep and then leave first thing in the morning.

pelario 6y ago
A key technique to avoid those situations was the "poisoned pill": buried in your profile there is some keyword they must include in their request. With that (which I copied once I was reading a full descriptive profile) you get a great filter. I have done a good share of CS, both as host and guest, over the last ~10 years, having either good or amazing experiences.
- namdnay 6y ago
  Ah very clever!
- teddyh 6y ago
  That’s a “brown M&M”, not a “poison pill”.
  - blaser-waffle 6y ago
    Yeah phrasing it that way -- poison pill -- is a good way to make people feel uneasy when you're staying with them.
    - vorpalhex 6y ago
      It would explain why they kept going out to restaurants instead of eating anything at the house...
- dbancajas 6y ago
  > ading a full descriptive profile) you get a great filter. I have done a good can you explain? what keywords do you have to put to avoid this?

maram 6y ago

I knew about Couchsurfing because my previous startup was in the rental marketplace. Although, I never tried it..I heard many good things about it. I also noticed Travis Kalanick used it as a title “couchsurfing” in one of his blogs before he launched Uber. https://swooshing.wordpress.com/?s=Jam+pad+&submit=Search https://swooshing.wordpress.com/?s=Jam+pad+&submit=Search

globular-toast 6y ago

I'm curious. What percentage of female surfers did you sleep with?

learnstats2 6y ago

This article is about the business CouchSurfing rather than the action of couch surfing.

mycall 6y ago

I was thinking about hosting on my boat too but I thought risky. Any pro tips?

simonebrunozzi 6y ago

Great comment. I've used couchsurfing in 2008-2009 a bit, but never to stay - just to meet local people when I was traveling for work in foreign places. The weird thing is, AirBnB came along, and I keep reading the sentence "nobody believed that hosting a stranger at home would work", which made me internally scream "but there's couchsurfing!!". In fact, I think that Couchsurfing (the website/company) had a chance to become like AirBnB. They didn't. Maybe intentionally.