I stopped reading at "I would like this to happen at runtime". I got burnt so many times by runtime craziness already that the only thing I want happening at r

I stopped reading at "I would like this to happen at runtime". I got burnt so many times by runtime craziness already that the only thing I want happening at runtime is trivial code running from top to bottom. But if you enjoy runtime hacks, more power to you! You must be a much better developer than me.