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To me, a lifelong search for happiness seems flawed and ephemeral. It's culturally very American, but doesn't seem to lead to happiness. I strive for purpose,

by wegs 6y ago

To me, a lifelong search for happiness seems flawed and ephemeral. It's culturally very American, but doesn't seem to lead to happiness. I strive for purpose, meaning, and positive impact. When I succeed, I'm happy. That drives how I pick my job and how I run my family life. The Frankl book "Man's Search for Meaning" makes a good case for this as a life goal. I'm not going to my categorical statements like yours. But in my life philosophy, it's not so much important to be happy, as to be a good person and to have a fulfilling life. But if other people have other values -- glorifying working hard for example -- it's important to respect that too.

4ist 6y ago
This is something I was thinking about lately. I think having the goal of being "not-unhappy" is more personally viable than aiming at happiness. In the past when I was seeking happiness I would just smoke weed and play videogames all day, which felt good at the time but the day after I would feel like trash because I wasted so much time/energy and typically ate straight garbage.
- hdni 6y ago
  Anna Karenina principle: happiness is the absence of all the things in the set of things that make you unhappy
aurbano 6y ago
Maybe it's just the wording we use, but when you say "But in my life philosophy, it's not so much important to be happy, as to be a good person and to have a fulfilling life." Doesn't that mean that being a good person and having a fulfilling life is what makes _you_ happy? This is something I think a lot about, and I know this is a philosophical topic that has been around for ever, but how do we call the state in which we're "ok" with our life? In your case the mental state when you believe that you're being a good person and having a fulfilling life? Is that happiness? Or is happiness a by-product of that state? I believe this is what Aristotle called achieving virtue, maybe, it's been a while since I studied philosophy...
- wegs 6y ago
  No, it doesn't. There are definitely times when being a good person and having a fulfilling life does make me happy. There are also times when it's tough and painful and makes me unhappy. There are more of the former than the latter (and I do believe striving for a meaningful life is a good strategy for reaching happiness), so there's a clear correlation, but they're not the same. They're not actually even close. There's an even bigger difference in why you do things. If you do something because it helps someone (and that results in you being happy) it's very different than if you do the exact same thing to make you happy (and that thing also results in helping someone). The philosophy I described is close to the philosophy of Aristotle or Confucius, albeit without the same rigid roles and social hierarchies which they use to define virtue. But the mental state of being content where you are is another thing entirely. That's related to several Eastern philosophies (Zen and Buddhism especially), but it's very different from the American philosophy of striving for individual happiness, or the Aristotelian / Confucian philosophy of striving for virtue.

by wegs 6y ago

4ist 6y ago

This is something I was thinking about lately. I think having the goal of being "not-unhappy" is more personally viable than aiming at happiness. In the past when I was seeking happiness I would just smoke weed and play videogames all day, which felt good at the time but the day after I would feel like trash because I wasted so much time/energy and typically ate straight garbage.

hdni 6y ago
Anna Karenina principle: happiness is the absence of all the things in the set of things that make you unhappy

aurbano 6y ago

Maybe it's just the wording we use, but when you say "But in my life philosophy, it's not so much important to be happy, as to be a good person and to have a fulfilling life." Doesn't that mean that being a good person and having a fulfilling life is what makes _you_ happy? This is something I think a lot about, and I know this is a philosophical topic that has been around for ever, but how do we call the state in which we're "ok" with our life? In your case the mental state when you believe that you're being a good person and having a fulfilling life? Is that happiness? Or is happiness a by-product of that state? I believe this is what Aristotle called achieving virtue, maybe, it's been a while since I studied philosophy...

wegs 6y ago
No, it doesn't. There are definitely times when being a good person and having a fulfilling life does make me happy. There are also times when it's tough and painful and makes me unhappy. There are more of the former than the latter (and I do believe striving for a meaningful life is a good strategy for reaching happiness), so there's a clear correlation, but they're not the same. They're not actually even close. There's an even bigger difference in why you do things. If you do something because it helps someone (and that results in you being happy) it's very different than if you do the exact same thing to make you happy (and that thing also results in helping someone). The philosophy I described is close to the philosophy of Aristotle or Confucius, albeit without the same rigid roles and social hierarchies which they use to define virtue. But the mental state of being content where you are is another thing entirely. That's related to several Eastern philosophies (Zen and Buddhism especially), but it's very different from the American philosophy of striving for individual happiness, or the Aristotelian / Confucian philosophy of striving for virtue.