6 ms·

Whenever you compose an email, put your ask in the first sentence. Do you want information from them? Do you want them to do something for you? Put it in the fi

Whenever you compose an email, put your ask in the first sentence. Do you want information from them? Do you want them to do something for you? Put it in the first sentence. Then put the explanation and details in the rest of the email.

thomk 6y ago
This. Even if you are emailing an old friend for a favor, put your request up front then put the cordial stuff after, its much more sincere that way. > Joe, we are looking for advisors to sit on our board. This is a non-paying position so I'm emailing all my old friends and asking for favors. Hey, how are you? How is your wife and son? Either way lets get together soon! --Aaron
- travisjungroth 6y ago
  That reads really weird. Putting a greeting in the middle of an email is jarring.
- parallel 6y ago
  I disagree with this but it may just be a style thing. Reading "Hey, how are you?" in the middle of the content put me on guard, I feel like I might be being manipulated somehow.
- have_faith 6y ago
  "hey, how are you" in he middle of an email after a request is very strange. Asking for something and finishing with the non committal "let's get together soon" is also a red flag that you might want something from me from a business perspective but are only feigning interesting from a personal perspective.
- Jedd 6y ago
  I really rail against people who think 'This.' is a sentence, let alone a useful contribution. It's especially galling when the topic is 'Put your question / point in the first sentence / paragraph' and someone's first word, sentence, and paragraph is simply 'This.'
  - objectivetruth 6y ago
    It's not supposed to be a sentence, and not every useful communication needs to be a sentence. It IS a shorthand for THIS sentence: "I agree completely with this article/post/comment." It's usually paired with a follow-up comment adding an additional point or related thought, which makes a lot of sense since this construct originated in a medium with a limited number of characters. You'll notice people don't say "This," in oral conversation; they say "Yeah," or "I agree." But even "This" on its own, meaning "I agree with this," is a useful contribution to a discussion. Sometimes "I agree with this" is all that needs to be said, and lots of us decided it was OK to shorten that to "This." Very interesting what galls people into railing against certain language usage! :-)
- gozzoo 6y ago
  This sounds very transactional, the personal concern seems to be an aftertoghth. I was struggling with this dilemma recently, when wrting an email. Knowing what you just said, that your request should be in the first paragraph, and at the same time wanting to show humman connection, I don't think that I did very good job. Still haven't found a smooth way to express both things in the first sentance/paragraph. I guess, it depends on the person you are writing to.
recroad 6y ago
Sometimes. Good 'ol BCQ works just fine as well when done succinctly.
- ppalevsky 6y ago
  What is BCQ?
  - parallel 6y ago
    Perhaps an attempt at humour? The article specifically says "spell out your acronyms".
  - recroad 6y ago
    Background, Complication, Questions Also referred to as SCQA. Situation, Complication, Questions, Answers.
AmericanChopper 6y ago
I’ve followed this format ever since I read about BLUF [0], and I’ve found it to be highly effective. I don’t use the same subject keywords the article describes, but I try to keep it concise. I put the point of the email first, a bit of background, and further explanation below that if required. I don’t think anybody really appreciates the beating around the bush and story telling that goes into a lot of corporate emails. [0]: https://hbr.org/2016/11/how-to-write-email-with-military-precision https://hbr.org/2016/11/how-to-write-email-with-military-pre...
- cachestash 6y ago
  Miltary parlance does not always translate well to civilian. His first example email ~~~ Shannon, Bottom Line: We will reduce the number of days that employees can work from home from three to one day per week effective December 1st. Background: * This is an effort to encourage team morale and foster team collaboration * All members of the management committee supported this decision ~~~~ A lot of people would take that for what it is, orders and not like it at all. In the military diplomacy is not so strongly needed as there is a clear chain of command. Things are not so set in the corporate world.
  - silveroriole 6y ago
    Yes, this seems like it’ll cause resentment and arguing unless Shannon is already bought in. She reads the first line and maybe thinks “but why? I don’t like it!”. She only gets to the reasoning after she’s set against the decision and looking for reasons to disagree. The other way round, she reads about increasing team morale and thinks “oh, good, I agree”, then is more likely to agree with the decision. If the boss can tell Shannon to deal with it like in the army, no problem. But in an office Shannon has lots of coworkers and bosses to formally complain to! Giving bottom lines which are in any way controversial in this manner will probably backfire imo.
    - ivanovb 6y ago
      But couldn't this be improved by just adding the 'condensed version' of the reason in the bottom line? For example: 'To improve team morale, we will reduce the number of days that employees can work from home from three to one day per week effective December 1st.'
tluyben2 6y ago
One of the depressing things I notice as I get older is that no-one reads anything. If it's not in the first sentence (or, for some people, last sentence) it is ignored. So I write 1 line emails. It's on HN too ofcourse; people respond to the first sentence without reading the rest, missing every and all nuance. Great stuff.
- Cthulhu_ 6y ago
  Yup, that's the downside of modern day internet culture; even as a software developer, my main and most used skills are reading and writing. And with reading, since there's so much of it people end up skim reading / skipping. Once upon a time I was on an internet forum and I would read each and every post. Nowadays, if it's longer than a paragraph long and not by someone I care about, I just glaze over - I can't be bothered anymore. Mind you, having less time for that kinda thing also doesn't help.
bryanrasmussen 6y ago
Also, at least if you're writing it to me, don't write several rambling pages where you also disparage other people in the project and then ask me at the very end of the email to not share it with the group. Put that don't share request at the top in caps, bold. Sorry, still sore years later.
- Cthulhu_ 6y ago
  Oof. Yeah, complaints about other people - if they are NOT formal - should not be in writing in the first place. If you're making a formal complaint, by all means. But otherwise, treat it like you're posting it on the internet for everyone to see.

thomk 6y ago

This. Even if you are emailing an old friend for a favor, put your request up front then put the cordial stuff after, its much more sincere that way. > Joe, we are looking for advisors to sit on our board. This is a non-paying position so I'm emailing all my old friends and asking for favors. Hey, how are you? How is your wife and son? Either way lets get together soon! --Aaron

travisjungroth 6y ago
That reads really weird. Putting a greeting in the middle of an email is jarring.
parallel 6y ago
I disagree with this but it may just be a style thing. Reading "Hey, how are you?" in the middle of the content put me on guard, I feel like I might be being manipulated somehow.
have_faith 6y ago
"hey, how are you" in he middle of an email after a request is very strange. Asking for something and finishing with the non committal "let's get together soon" is also a red flag that you might want something from me from a business perspective but are only feigning interesting from a personal perspective.
Jedd 6y ago
I really rail against people who think 'This.' is a sentence, let alone a useful contribution. It's especially galling when the topic is 'Put your question / point in the first sentence / paragraph' and someone's first word, sentence, and paragraph is simply 'This.'
- objectivetruth 6y ago
  It's not supposed to be a sentence, and not every useful communication needs to be a sentence. It IS a shorthand for THIS sentence: "I agree completely with this article/post/comment." It's usually paired with a follow-up comment adding an additional point or related thought, which makes a lot of sense since this construct originated in a medium with a limited number of characters. You'll notice people don't say "This," in oral conversation; they say "Yeah," or "I agree." But even "This" on its own, meaning "I agree with this," is a useful contribution to a discussion. Sometimes "I agree with this" is all that needs to be said, and lots of us decided it was OK to shorten that to "This." Very interesting what galls people into railing against certain language usage! :-)
gozzoo 6y ago
This sounds very transactional, the personal concern seems to be an aftertoghth. I was struggling with this dilemma recently, when wrting an email. Knowing what you just said, that your request should be in the first paragraph, and at the same time wanting to show humman connection, I don't think that I did very good job. Still haven't found a smooth way to express both things in the first sentance/paragraph. I guess, it depends on the person you are writing to.

recroad 6y ago

Sometimes. Good 'ol BCQ works just fine as well when done succinctly.

ppalevsky 6y ago
What is BCQ?
- parallel 6y ago
  Perhaps an attempt at humour? The article specifically says "spell out your acronyms".
- recroad 6y ago
  Background, Complication, Questions Also referred to as SCQA. Situation, Complication, Questions, Answers.

AmericanChopper 6y ago

I’ve followed this format ever since I read about BLUF [0], and I’ve found it to be highly effective. I don’t use the same subject keywords the article describes, but I try to keep it concise. I put the point of the email first, a bit of background, and further explanation below that if required. I don’t think anybody really appreciates the beating around the bush and story telling that goes into a lot of corporate emails. [0]: https://hbr.org/2016/11/how-to-write-email-with-military-precision https://hbr.org/2016/11/how-to-write-email-with-military-pre...

cachestash 6y ago
Miltary parlance does not always translate well to civilian. His first example email ~~~ Shannon, Bottom Line: We will reduce the number of days that employees can work from home from three to one day per week effective December 1st. Background: * This is an effort to encourage team morale and foster team collaboration * All members of the management committee supported this decision ~~~~ A lot of people would take that for what it is, orders and not like it at all. In the military diplomacy is not so strongly needed as there is a clear chain of command. Things are not so set in the corporate world.
- silveroriole 6y ago
  Yes, this seems like it’ll cause resentment and arguing unless Shannon is already bought in. She reads the first line and maybe thinks “but why? I don’t like it!”. She only gets to the reasoning after she’s set against the decision and looking for reasons to disagree. The other way round, she reads about increasing team morale and thinks “oh, good, I agree”, then is more likely to agree with the decision. If the boss can tell Shannon to deal with it like in the army, no problem. But in an office Shannon has lots of coworkers and bosses to formally complain to! Giving bottom lines which are in any way controversial in this manner will probably backfire imo.
  - ivanovb 6y ago
    But couldn't this be improved by just adding the 'condensed version' of the reason in the bottom line? For example: 'To improve team morale, we will reduce the number of days that employees can work from home from three to one day per week effective December 1st.'

tluyben2 6y ago

One of the depressing things I notice as I get older is that no-one reads anything. If it's not in the first sentence (or, for some people, last sentence) it is ignored. So I write 1 line emails. It's on HN too ofcourse; people respond to the first sentence without reading the rest, missing every and all nuance. Great stuff.

Cthulhu_ 6y ago
Yup, that's the downside of modern day internet culture; even as a software developer, my main and most used skills are reading and writing. And with reading, since there's so much of it people end up skim reading / skipping. Once upon a time I was on an internet forum and I would read each and every post. Nowadays, if it's longer than a paragraph long and not by someone I care about, I just glaze over - I can't be bothered anymore. Mind you, having less time for that kinda thing also doesn't help.

bryanrasmussen 6y ago

Also, at least if you're writing it to me, don't write several rambling pages where you also disparage other people in the project and then ask me at the very end of the email to not share it with the group. Put that don't share request at the top in caps, bold. Sorry, still sore years later.

Cthulhu_ 6y ago
Oof. Yeah, complaints about other people - if they are NOT formal - should not be in writing in the first place. If you're making a formal complaint, by all means. But otherwise, treat it like you're posting it on the internet for everyone to see.