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I understand the need to treat life as a dichotomy between work and play, but I feel you might have lost some of the magic of your childhood. For me it's the op

I understand the need to treat life as a dichotomy between work and play, but I feel you might have lost some of the magic of your childhood. For me it's the opposite, I hated complex games as a child but really enjoy them today. For me, the best feeling is working hard for something and really getting into the details and enjoying all the complexity of the experience / challenge. I think that most human beings are wired to enjoy this kind of activity if they can get past the energy activation barrier. I've been in situations where I did not value the above. Looking back, I believe I was: - too mentally drained to enjoy anything - any free time goes to diving into Random Access Media (reddit, hnews, youtube, etc) - Never feeling full of energy or excitement and unable to find meaningful recharge I saw a psychiatrist and got diagnosed with depression (systematically defined as not wanting to do anything at least once a week). Since then I've taking an active approach to monitoring and improving my mental state. Specifically: 1. Identifying true energy restoring activities: 3 of them are - 1) engaging in conversations where there's a decent amount of laughter 2) Sleep / naps and 3) exercise 2. Identifying energy traps - things you do when you have no energy but don't restore energy. Several examples: 1) Netflix, 2) social media, 3) reddit, 4) youtube 3. Figuring out my mental health dietary needs (what is it that you're longing for that is unconsciously affecting your decision making) and making active plans to get them in a regular way. This could be social validation, laughter, new engaging experiences, feelings of accomplishment or accolade, etc. Instead of feeling like I don't want to do anything when I wake up, I more often find life as exciting and looking forward to the challenges and new experiences of each day. And yes, I enjoy Factorio a lot when I have the time to play (which is rare).

burntoutfire 7y ago
> 2. Identifying energy traps - things you do when you have no energy but don't restore energy. Several examples: 1) Netflix, 2) social media, 3) reddit, 4) youtube So, do you avoid them now? If so, what do you do when you're tired after work? It's hard to feel entire afternoons with exercise, sleep and conversations...
- panta 7y ago
  Not the OP, but for me energy restoring activities are “active” ones, like hobbies where you create/build something. Working on a painting, photo, sculpting, writing, working on a side project, playing intelligent games with your dog, ... Passive activities, like consuming TV or Netflix or worse social networks, at least for me are draining my energy levels.
  - lonelappde 7y ago
    By they definition, isn't going to work an energy restoring activity?
    - aleksaxyz 7y ago
      A hobby is something you go out of your way to do because of personal passion. If you approach your job like it's a vacation, then probably.
- spyckie2 7y ago
  The ideal cycle you want is focus, rest, focus. It's an energy trap if you get tired from focusing but your rest activity doesn't refresh you back into focus mode. In my experience, it's not that you replace energy traps with energy recovery - you instead create plans that allow for more focus, rest, focus cycles throughout the day. If your work drains you completely when you go home, maybe you can try to create some plans for how to approach work holistically, sparing some energy for life outside of work. For instance, create a plan that ends the work day with a lot of energy to spare by adding in a lot more rest cycles, including naps (laying down with eyes closed also restores energy) and walks. I also find creative outlets like writing or music quite restful, and as others have mentioned, a surprisingly lot of things restore energy - you just have to discover and note them down.
lonelappde 7y ago
Is your job stimulating or boring? I have a hard time expending energy learning to play games to solve fake problems, when I could be using that energy to solve real problems, including, as you note, my health. Also, raising my kids.
- TeMPOraL 7y ago
  Ironically, what you wrote often explains the misery of work. After all, it's hard expending energy to solve fake problems at work, when there are real and more interesting problems to solve after work.
draw_down 7y ago
I think it’s ok if people don’t prefer this sort of game, people enjoy different things. And I’m not sure it implies anything about “losing childhood”, if that is even a thing, which I’m not sure it is.
throwaway1239Mx 7y ago
Thank you for sharing this. I've been feeling out of sorts and overwhelmed[0], and this really resonated. I generally tend to avoid things like (3) unless sharing them with someone else, and this feels like the reason why, moreso than being a waste of time or generally "not helpful for my mental state". There are plenty other things that I still do, which click as "energy traps" now that I read this - gonna reframe into sources/sinks internally, but still. Thank you. I will likely lose the location of this comment by the time I've really tested cycling between sink and sources (which should take a few weeks or so at least), but I'm going to spend some time exploring my energy landscape today and see where it takes my well-being. [0] Work has been nuts, so some of the overwhelm is just normal, but I suspect another portion of overwhelm is well explained by the energy metaphor.
StavrosK 7y ago
Wait, if you don't want to do anything once a week you're diagnosed as depressed? How many people don't want to just sit around even once every week?!
- arbitrary_name 7y ago
  Me for one. I find it hard to sit down and watch TV for more than an hour at a time. I have a foot injury right now and the mental adjustment to sitting more instead of being up and around is...significant.
  - StavrosK 7y ago
    Not even once a week?
- spyckie2 7y ago
  The official stance from my psychiatrist was, if you have times where nothing seems that interesting to do or there is no motivation to do normal day to day activities, and that happens regularly (once a week) then you're clinically diagnosed as having minor depression. If you have those several times a week it can be major depression.

burntoutfire 7y ago

> 2. Identifying energy traps - things you do when you have no energy but don't restore energy. Several examples: 1) Netflix, 2) social media, 3) reddit, 4) youtube So, do you avoid them now? If so, what do you do when you're tired after work? It's hard to feel entire afternoons with exercise, sleep and conversations...

panta 7y ago
Not the OP, but for me energy restoring activities are “active” ones, like hobbies where you create/build something. Working on a painting, photo, sculpting, writing, working on a side project, playing intelligent games with your dog, ... Passive activities, like consuming TV or Netflix or worse social networks, at least for me are draining my energy levels.
- lonelappde 7y ago
  By they definition, isn't going to work an energy restoring activity?
  - aleksaxyz 7y ago
    A hobby is something you go out of your way to do because of personal passion. If you approach your job like it's a vacation, then probably.
spyckie2 7y ago
The ideal cycle you want is focus, rest, focus. It's an energy trap if you get tired from focusing but your rest activity doesn't refresh you back into focus mode. In my experience, it's not that you replace energy traps with energy recovery - you instead create plans that allow for more focus, rest, focus cycles throughout the day. If your work drains you completely when you go home, maybe you can try to create some plans for how to approach work holistically, sparing some energy for life outside of work. For instance, create a plan that ends the work day with a lot of energy to spare by adding in a lot more rest cycles, including naps (laying down with eyes closed also restores energy) and walks. I also find creative outlets like writing or music quite restful, and as others have mentioned, a surprisingly lot of things restore energy - you just have to discover and note them down.

lonelappde 7y ago

Is your job stimulating or boring? I have a hard time expending energy learning to play games to solve fake problems, when I could be using that energy to solve real problems, including, as you note, my health. Also, raising my kids.

TeMPOraL 7y ago
Ironically, what you wrote often explains the misery of work. After all, it's hard expending energy to solve fake problems at work, when there are real and more interesting problems to solve after work.

draw_down 7y ago

I think it’s ok if people don’t prefer this sort of game, people enjoy different things. And I’m not sure it implies anything about “losing childhood”, if that is even a thing, which I’m not sure it is.

throwaway1239Mx 7y ago

Thank you for sharing this. I've been feeling out of sorts and overwhelmed[0], and this really resonated. I generally tend to avoid things like (3) unless sharing them with someone else, and this feels like the reason why, moreso than being a waste of time or generally "not helpful for my mental state". There are plenty other things that I still do, which click as "energy traps" now that I read this - gonna reframe into sources/sinks internally, but still. Thank you. I will likely lose the location of this comment by the time I've really tested cycling between sink and sources (which should take a few weeks or so at least), but I'm going to spend some time exploring my energy landscape today and see where it takes my well-being. [0] Work has been nuts, so some of the overwhelm is just normal, but I suspect another portion of overwhelm is well explained by the energy metaphor.

StavrosK 7y ago

Wait, if you don't want to do anything once a week you're diagnosed as depressed? How many people don't want to just sit around even once every week?!

arbitrary_name 7y ago
Me for one. I find it hard to sit down and watch TV for more than an hour at a time. I have a foot injury right now and the mental adjustment to sitting more instead of being up and around is...significant.
- StavrosK 7y ago
  Not even once a week?
spyckie2 7y ago
The official stance from my psychiatrist was, if you have times where nothing seems that interesting to do or there is no motivation to do normal day to day activities, and that happens regularly (once a week) then you're clinically diagnosed as having minor depression. If you have those several times a week it can be major depression.