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A generation or two ago, people just ignored their children. They told them to go play outside until the sun come down. Now expectations have changed. These exp

A generation or two ago, people just ignored their children. They told them to go play outside until the sun come down. Now expectations have changed. These expectations make it impossible to have a decent amount of "alone" time during this quarantine. This renders many people unhappy. We love our children, but we can't handle having them with us 100% of the time. This has never been "normal".

TeMPOraL 6y ago
Not to mention, if you expected to be with your spouse and kids 24/7 under the same roof for extended periods of time, you'd probably buy a larger apartment. Or perhaps a home with a garden. Even if it would cost significantly more than your current one. Much like global supply chains, our decisions are optimized quite tightly to our individual lifestyles; what worked well in normal times suddenly doesn't when lifestyles are forced to change.
- silveroriole 6y ago
  I think this gives the real answer to my question, which is that other people don’t plan for the worst case in the way I do. I wouldn’t have children unless I was absolutely sure I could deal with them, because the worst case is so awful (you can’t really get rid of them once you have them). I did factor in things like “is this house big enough if I need to avoid my partner for long periods of time?” into my buying decision. And so on. It didn’t really occur to me that people would make very large life decisions like where to live or whether to have children based on things continuing to be ‘normal’.
  - dan-robertson 6y ago
    If one reads this comment literally, it looks as if you are completely oblivious to the constraints and realities of other people’s lives. I’m sure your real attitude isn’t so extreme (though if it is then I guess I should congratulate on being so prescient and good at planning). For the record: - lots of people make decisions they later regret. Sometimes they make these based on assumptions that later turn out to be incorrect, sometimes on incomplete information, sometimes based on stress or strong emotion, sometimes in line with advice, and sometimes against advice. Sometimes the effects are small, sometimes they are large, sometimes they ought not be regretted. - some people have children without planning to beforehand (for various reasons) - most people can’t take extreme worst case scenarios into account when making big life decisions (eg “If I become unemployed or unable to work in 5 years I wouldn’t be able to afford any mortgage therefore I shouldn’t buy a house”) - some people are constrained by other factors (eg “I’d like to have more space but I can’t afford a larger house which is sufficiently close to my work”) - It’s reasonably natural for people to want to have children and sometimes they this even if they know it will be hard.
  - op00to 6y ago
    No, you didn’t.

TeMPOraL 6y ago

Not to mention, if you expected to be with your spouse and kids 24/7 under the same roof for extended periods of time, you'd probably buy a larger apartment. Or perhaps a home with a garden. Even if it would cost significantly more than your current one. Much like global supply chains, our decisions are optimized quite tightly to our individual lifestyles; what worked well in normal times suddenly doesn't when lifestyles are forced to change.

silveroriole 6y ago
I think this gives the real answer to my question, which is that other people don’t plan for the worst case in the way I do. I wouldn’t have children unless I was absolutely sure I could deal with them, because the worst case is so awful (you can’t really get rid of them once you have them). I did factor in things like “is this house big enough if I need to avoid my partner for long periods of time?” into my buying decision. And so on. It didn’t really occur to me that people would make very large life decisions like where to live or whether to have children based on things continuing to be ‘normal’.
- dan-robertson 6y ago
  If one reads this comment literally, it looks as if you are completely oblivious to the constraints and realities of other people’s lives. I’m sure your real attitude isn’t so extreme (though if it is then I guess I should congratulate on being so prescient and good at planning). For the record: - lots of people make decisions they later regret. Sometimes they make these based on assumptions that later turn out to be incorrect, sometimes on incomplete information, sometimes based on stress or strong emotion, sometimes in line with advice, and sometimes against advice. Sometimes the effects are small, sometimes they are large, sometimes they ought not be regretted. - some people have children without planning to beforehand (for various reasons) - most people can’t take extreme worst case scenarios into account when making big life decisions (eg “If I become unemployed or unable to work in 5 years I wouldn’t be able to afford any mortgage therefore I shouldn’t buy a house”) - some people are constrained by other factors (eg “I’d like to have more space but I can’t afford a larger house which is sufficiently close to my work”) - It’s reasonably natural for people to want to have children and sometimes they this even if they know it will be hard.
- op00to 6y ago
  No, you didn’t.