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> I don't entirely agree with the concept. Going through stressful situations can either hack away at your being or it can help make you a more informed and res

by vageli 7y ago

> I don't entirely agree with the concept. Going through stressful situations can either hack away at your being or it can help make you a more informed and resilient person. > Pain can either be useful or useless. Physical exercise is painful. That's useful pain. Falling down and breaking your hip is useless pain. In my experience it's not either/or, it's both. I've been in traumatic experiences during which I've told myself that I would come out on the other side better from the experience, and I have. That doesn't and didn't make the experience more bearable while I was undergoing it. It may have offered comfort but not much, and even then in the moment I felt guilty for feeling like I was experiencing something positive (the comfort).

hosh 7y ago
It always sucks when you experience it in the moment. This is me with knowing a lot about the meditation and concentration techniques, and having been through numerous rough cycles.
dumbfoundded 7y ago
You're right that it's not always the either/or. A single experience can help in some ways and hurt in others. Maybe a better way to phrase it is that there are some painful experiences that teach us to change ourselves and others that help us learn acceptance and resilience. I also agree with your sentiment that while you're going through it, you may not really care or not if it makes you a better person in the long term. The immediate pain can be overwhelming. I do believe we should engage our painful experiences though. Really self reflect on them and allow ourselves to feel the emotion. Avoidance is the only surefire way to build debt.
outworlder 7y ago
> That doesn't and didn't make the experience more bearable while I was undergoing it Amen. Once you are through then, and provided you survived the experience unscathed, then that might build a thicker skin. Or it might not, and you start having issues requiring psychological treatment. YMMV

by vageli 7y ago

hosh 7y ago

It always sucks when you experience it in the moment. This is me with knowing a lot about the meditation and concentration techniques, and having been through numerous rough cycles.

dumbfoundded 7y ago

You're right that it's not always the either/or. A single experience can help in some ways and hurt in others. Maybe a better way to phrase it is that there are some painful experiences that teach us to change ourselves and others that help us learn acceptance and resilience. I also agree with your sentiment that while you're going through it, you may not really care or not if it makes you a better person in the long term. The immediate pain can be overwhelming. I do believe we should engage our painful experiences though. Really self reflect on them and allow ourselves to feel the emotion. Avoidance is the only surefire way to build debt.

outworlder 7y ago

> That doesn't and didn't make the experience more bearable while I was undergoing it Amen. Once you are through then, and provided you survived the experience unscathed, then that might build a thicker skin. Or it might not, and you start having issues requiring psychological treatment. YMMV