Let's say, arbitrarily, that you automatically connect with 20% of people, 50% of people take some work, and the other 20% aren't worth it. The 20% that aren't

Let's say, arbitrarily, that you automatically connect with 20% of people, 50% of people take some work, and the other 20% aren't worth it. The 20% that aren't worth it can be further split into people who are very different from yourself, wallflowers, and antisocial individuals. If you are not eager to please, you will identify the last 20% easily. The trick, though, is that you can't automatically dismiss them. You must assess their importance to work or personal goals, and tread lightly if they are important. With the 50% who take some work, I've found that de facto talking to them like we're already friends helps unlock great conversations. I consistently take the small risk of seeming eccentric in order to get past small talk in my first conversation with strangers. I don't even do that to form lasting friendships. It allows me to make "temporary friends" wherever I go, making for a more pleasant day if nothing else. It also helps me have a stronger sense of identity. I feel more "generic" when I talk about generic things.