Definitely some tension between the two. Maybe another way of saying it is that it's helpful to simultaneously work toward a specific outcome that you would enj

Definitely some tension between the two. Maybe another way of saying it is that it's helpful to simultaneously work toward a specific outcome that you would enjoy or prefer, but not be attached to in a way that'd create resentment if it doesn't happen. Doing this when it comes to investing in relationships seems to decrease the sense of pressure and increase the sense of possibility and fun.