4 ms·

I have struggled with "depression" for decades. Now I'm healed. I went to countless psychiatrists, took drugs and everything. I didn't really help much. I told

I have struggled with "depression" for decades. Now I'm healed. I went to countless psychiatrists, took drugs and everything. I didn't really help much. I told them I feel bad, they labeled me "depressive" without trying to find out what is really going on. In the the end I had to find it out by myself. The depression was just a symptom. The main cause of it was a social phobia. None of the therapists ever addressed this. Other factors: unforgiveness and my own frustration that I wasn't aware of in many situations. So I started peeling off all these layers. I just didn't really know myself, was so full of inhibitions. Often depression isn't something you should be afraid of. Neither is it something that you just "have" like a sickness. There may be reasons for the depression and maybe you can dig them out. I just skimmed the article but what I've read seems to be how to cope with depression, not how to address the underlying issues. Better try to find out where it comes from, if possible.

etherdoc 7y ago
how did you improve your social phobia?
- retonom 7y ago
  it's not so hard when you know how. so when a person looks at you and you feel insecure the normal reaction would be to look away. now just don't look away being conscious of this feeling that makes you want to look away. the key to overcome social phobia is body language. change your body language and the feeling will follow and slowly the phobia will get less and less. then after enough practice you become more and more open and inviting. people will start to like you because you seem to be an easy going guy always ready to talk, share and laugh. then being in company will not be a burden anymore but something to enjoy. it is so different now. I was so miserable because of this and couldn't enjoy fellowship for more than 20 years.
bobbylarrybobby 7y ago
How did you discover these facts about yourself?
- retonom 7y ago
  good question. of course I got older which helped in bringing the inhibitions down which made me more aware of myself and of my own feelings. then going after those feelings and trying to figure out what they mean I slowly discovered what was behind them. for example, one day I was in a course and I felt miserable even before I was there. then suddenly it dawned on me that this is my aversion to the whole thing. it's not rational but irrational. once I knew what was going on the bad feeling went away quite quickly when as before I'd just suffer without end. before I was helpless, now when a negative feeling comes I try to guess what it could mean and often I find the answer quite quickly. once the source is identified, the bad feeling dissolves and I'm back to normal. and another important factor was that I started trying to live by the golden rule: "do unto others as you would have them do to you". the problem was that not to do this often caused a lot of the confusion in my life and my feelings. I don't think it would have been possible to figure it out while I was in this chaos caused by not following the golden rule. oh yeah, and the last thing that helped a lot is that I stopped going to therapists and took on responsibility, not relying on what others say about how I feel.

etherdoc 7y ago

how did you improve your social phobia?

retonom 7y ago
it's not so hard when you know how. so when a person looks at you and you feel insecure the normal reaction would be to look away. now just don't look away being conscious of this feeling that makes you want to look away. the key to overcome social phobia is body language. change your body language and the feeling will follow and slowly the phobia will get less and less. then after enough practice you become more and more open and inviting. people will start to like you because you seem to be an easy going guy always ready to talk, share and laugh. then being in company will not be a burden anymore but something to enjoy. it is so different now. I was so miserable because of this and couldn't enjoy fellowship for more than 20 years.

bobbylarrybobby 7y ago

How did you discover these facts about yourself?

retonom 7y ago
good question. of course I got older which helped in bringing the inhibitions down which made me more aware of myself and of my own feelings. then going after those feelings and trying to figure out what they mean I slowly discovered what was behind them. for example, one day I was in a course and I felt miserable even before I was there. then suddenly it dawned on me that this is my aversion to the whole thing. it's not rational but irrational. once I knew what was going on the bad feeling went away quite quickly when as before I'd just suffer without end. before I was helpless, now when a negative feeling comes I try to guess what it could mean and often I find the answer quite quickly. once the source is identified, the bad feeling dissolves and I'm back to normal. and another important factor was that I started trying to live by the golden rule: "do unto others as you would have them do to you". the problem was that not to do this often caused a lot of the confusion in my life and my feelings. I don't think it would have been possible to figure it out while I was in this chaos caused by not following the golden rule. oh yeah, and the last thing that helped a lot is that I stopped going to therapists and took on responsibility, not relying on what others say about how I feel.