I never curse in my commit messages. That doesn't mean I don't want to! Cursing is a vice of mine, acquired through summers of cleaning bathrooms and picking up

I never curse in my commit messages. That doesn't mean I don't want to! Cursing is a vice of mine, acquired through summers of cleaning bathrooms and picking up trash at a state park in high school. I use euphamisms when coding professionally, but it's easy to map my commit messages at old companies back to my original swear. "Blameless" bug: Original: Now recalculates the height of the container element after repopulating the content. Translation: Did Bob test this fucking thing ONCE before he committed this? Fixing my own mistake: Original: Tweaks the NUM_PATHS config value. Translation: Wow, I apparently have shit-for-brains. I hope nobody ran a build in the past 20 minutes. Overdesigning: Original: Updates the object creation code per Bob's feedback. Translation: Another Goddamn FactoryFactoryBuilder?! I officially don't understand this codebase. Major cleanup needed: Original: Style tweaks needed for GCC compilation. Translation: OMFG. This isn't even valid C++. It doesn't even compile. OK, I'm not perfect: Original: Fuck IE7. Translation: No seriously, fuck IE7.