first of all, I think that's a weaker approach. I learned in highschool that if your accuser doesn't state how they know you did something, they often don't act

first of all, I think that's a weaker approach. I learned in highschool that if your accuser doesn't state how they know you did something, they often don't actually know for sure and are hoping you'll incriminate yourself. my guess is that opening leads people to just deny it until your show a bit more of your hand. but my main point is that, unless the behavior happened in a very public place, the offender is likely to assume the victim reported it themselves, whether or not they actually did! the risk of retaliation probably needs to be weighed when deciding whether to confront the wrongdoer at all, unless the offense was so severe that they can be removed from the environment immediately.