What you are describing sounds to me like a struggle with managing where you put your attention — that you are drawn to focus on things to a degree you find det

What you are describing sounds to me like a struggle with managing where you put your attention — that you are drawn to focus on things to a degree you find detrimental. This is also a trait of ADHD (inattentive subtype), so you may find some of the techniques people use to handle it to be useful in your journey.