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> you don't really know what you want and are waiting for A Vision that will inspire you I think this is true, to an extent. I want to become an expert at SO

> you don't really know what you want and are waiting for A Vision that will inspire you I think this is true, to an extent. I want to become an expert at SOMETHING in programming but I have a hard time committing to one domain. Constantly plagued by FOMO. For example, if I were to deep dive into machine learning, I'd feel FOMO that I am not a robotics engineer, and couldn't code firmware well. Or If I became an expert at mobile development, I'd feel FOMO that I stumble to create a beautiful web app, etc. So yes, I don't really know what I want, and I'm waiting for a vision to inspire me.... Just as you put it. > waiting for the right wave to pick you up and sweep you into the future isn't really satisfying and so you're starting to feel burnout true. > your anxiety is rooted in uncertainty about where you're going and the feeling of futility that accompanies just swimming along with the current and never arriving anywhere in particular. There's a ton of truth in this statement. No doubt, it's the source of or a major contributor to, my angst.

crysis2917 7y ago
Even the best mathematicians are only experts in 1 or 2 areas. You just can't be an expert in every programming domain without revising your definition of expert. Also, are you pursuing being an expert at "something" in programming just to be an expert, or are you actually interested in what you want to become an expert in?
anigbrowl 7y ago
OK, let's drill down into this. It's cliche, but it sounds like you want to be something more than do something - there isn't a particular thing you are sure you want to implement, but you crave the recognition/social reward of having done something objectively good. This is completely legit by the way, and something many people struggle with or have in the past. It's a feeling I'm very familiar with and I share with you the compulsion to constantly accumulate knowledge and expertise. I'm gonna guess you don't like depending on other people and feel obliged to be able to do (or at least understand) every part of a great enterprise by yourself. In its best form this can be a trait of a master builder like a great architect or industrialist; at its worst this can devolve into control freakery and inability to form or fully participate in teams, limiting you to what you can achieve on your own as an individual (which might be a lot, but is a severe limitation nonetheless.. Part of success is knowing who to partner with, who to bounce your ideas off, who to ask for help, and so on - not easy things to do if you have a strong drive for self-sufficiency. I had to adjust to the idea that while I'm very good at some things, I'm quite lacking in others that are equally important - some kinds of communication, and networking in particular. Another thing I struggle with is the problem looking at things I could get very good at and being honest with myself about whether I should invest the time, or whether I would get bored and demotivated, or whether it matters to be good at it when I could just deal with someone who has far more experience in some specialty thing and also enjoys it. You clearly have a lot of drive; I think the key question is what you want to apply it to? Like suppose you won the lottery and could just set up and hire in people as required...what would you be doing with those capabilities? Conversely, are there things that obsess you even though they may be un-commercial or actively anti-commercial? What if you had a stroke or got hit by a car and could still function in the world but couldn't read or write code any more - what would you apply your drive to if you had to rely exclusively on other people to get it done? What things do you fantasize/daydream about being able to have/use/do even if they seem impossibly out of reach? Having a clear goal or an identifiable obsession makes a massive difference because it gives you an external yardstick with which to evaluate priorities instead of just being overwhelmed by the rich and ever-multiplying variety of tools and techniques at your disposal. Feel free to drop me a line if you like.

crysis2917 7y ago

Even the best mathematicians are only experts in 1 or 2 areas. You just can't be an expert in every programming domain without revising your definition of expert. Also, are you pursuing being an expert at "something" in programming just to be an expert, or are you actually interested in what you want to become an expert in?

anigbrowl 7y ago

OK, let's drill down into this. It's cliche, but it sounds like you want to be something more than do something - there isn't a particular thing you are sure you want to implement, but you crave the recognition/social reward of having done something objectively good. This is completely legit by the way, and something many people struggle with or have in the past. It's a feeling I'm very familiar with and I share with you the compulsion to constantly accumulate knowledge and expertise. I'm gonna guess you don't like depending on other people and feel obliged to be able to do (or at least understand) every part of a great enterprise by yourself. In its best form this can be a trait of a master builder like a great architect or industrialist; at its worst this can devolve into control freakery and inability to form or fully participate in teams, limiting you to what you can achieve on your own as an individual (which might be a lot, but is a severe limitation nonetheless.. Part of success is knowing who to partner with, who to bounce your ideas off, who to ask for help, and so on - not easy things to do if you have a strong drive for self-sufficiency. I had to adjust to the idea that while I'm very good at some things, I'm quite lacking in others that are equally important - some kinds of communication, and networking in particular. Another thing I struggle with is the problem looking at things I could get very good at and being honest with myself about whether I should invest the time, or whether I would get bored and demotivated, or whether it matters to be good at it when I could just deal with someone who has far more experience in some specialty thing and also enjoys it. You clearly have a lot of drive; I think the key question is what you want to apply it to? Like suppose you won the lottery and could just set up and hire in people as required...what would you be doing with those capabilities? Conversely, are there things that obsess you even though they may be un-commercial or actively anti-commercial? What if you had a stroke or got hit by a car and could still function in the world but couldn't read or write code any more - what would you apply your drive to if you had to rely exclusively on other people to get it done? What things do you fantasize/daydream about being able to have/use/do even if they seem impossibly out of reach? Having a clear goal or an identifiable obsession makes a massive difference because it gives you an external yardstick with which to evaluate priorities instead of just being overwhelmed by the rich and ever-multiplying variety of tools and techniques at your disposal. Feel free to drop me a line if you like.