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Wow, this is amazing. I can't help but think of all the sarcastic answers I would give the so-called manager with a slight grin on my face. Seriously, I think

Wow, this is amazing. I can't help but think of all the sarcastic answers I would give the so-called manager with a slight grin on my face. Seriously, I think this list is a potent illustration of modern management bullcrap. Come on guys, don't do this to your team, they are not children...

saagarjha 7y ago
What kind of questions would you ask?
- yankit 7y ago
  I especially like these 2: - what we as a company doing wrong? - name 10 things which can kill our business?
KingOfCoders 7y ago
What question in particular do you find not appropriate?
- dijit 7y ago
  “What did you want to be when you grow up” feels a bit out of touch.
  - KingOfCoders 7y ago
    Yes might be, and I would agree. Although it could be a great opener for finding out what the person wants. I have often found it the hardest thing to help find out what the person I had 1on1s with wanted to become (or not, e.g. a manager). Sometimes people have a clear vision, sometimes it took a year. Everyone was happier though.
  - yankit 7y ago
    I guess it depends on what kind of connection you have with your manager. I saw managers who would rather fire people if they feel they would be happier ion another place.
- stephc_int13 7y ago
  The list would be way too long. In my opinion, the so-called 1 on 1 meeting should only be used when an employee is clearly on the wrong trajectory and a course correction is needed. Good feedback is difficult, what I've seen was very often high noise and low signal. Forcing feedback when not necessary will not lead to added value for the company, only mildly boring and stressful waste of time, in the best case.
  - helij 7y ago
    Ha! But you can prevent the wrong trajectory by acting before. And, one of the ways to do that is honest conversation with your co-worker.
    - stephc_int13 7y ago
      As soon as a wrong trajectory is detected, yes, feedback is needed. But not before.
      - lonelappde 7y ago
        How often is someone on the perfect trajectory without ever discussing their concerns or desires?
  - ebiester 7y ago
    You don’t ask all of them at once - one or two of them may get used in a week. Feedback comes because you’re talking on a regular (weekly or bi-weekly) basis. If the employee is on the wrong trajectory, you’ve waited far too long to talk!
pseudoramble 7y ago
Do you not like the substance of the questions, or do you not like the delivery of the questions in this list? After reading through a small sample, I agree with you that if you asked these questions verbatim it would be ridiculous. And this list is kinda massive, so there are probably some that truly are not useful. The substance behind some of the questions could be useful IMO. One would need some rapport and context to use them. If they were reworded and delivered in ways that made more sense for those people, it could be helpful.
ratiolat 7y ago
Sarcasm and cynicism are signs of burnout. If ones arrives there, change to a job which actually is satisfying for you. No need to spend yourself and others on unhappy job.
- fs111 7y ago
  lol, they are a sign of experience, not burnout
- dchyrdvh 7y ago
  Apathy is a sign of burnout.
marcinzm 7y ago
Your manager asking is a sign they're trying to help you and understand you. You can rebuff that but then you shouldn't wonder in the future why your job isn't going the way you want it to (and why your coworkers aren't having the same issues).
cek 7y ago
Wow, you are either a troll or clueless. There is no more powerful form of ensuring manager/employee alignment than 1:1 meetings.
- stephc_int13 7y ago
  I've co-founded companies, I've led teams and been CEO of a small video game studio. As a manager, I never felt the need to bother anyone with 1:1 meetings. I think it is very easy to shoot yourself in the foot with feedback, this is a difficult art. And I think the best strategy is to use feedback only to deal with outliers, ie exceptional or catastrophic achievements.
  - hk__2 7y ago
    > As a manager, I never felt the need to bother anyone with 1:1 meetings. How do you collect feedback then?
    - stephc_int13 7y ago
      Talking with people in an informal way, over lunch, work meetings (brainstorm) and direct day-to-day conversations.
      - joshuamorton 7y ago
        So you make an effort to take time out of your day for informal, one on one conversations with members of your team? Over lunch, and directly in passing?
  - pvorb 7y ago
    I think it's important to give feedback to employees that behave like you'd expect, too. Otherwise they might wonder if they are doing something wrong and change their behavior.
  - Insanity 7y ago
    I've worked for managers that did and didn't do 1:1 meetings. At some places I've missed them - because the managers were out of touch with the team. In other places where there were no 1:1 but a lot of 'hallway conversations' that seemed to replace them. So they had an 'finger on the pulse' of the team. That was pretty great - because of how informal it was and it worked. I've also had great 1:1s though. So YMMV I guess, but it's hard to generalize. I think a lot depends on the company culture - some companies might benefit from them while others don't. There's no golden rule.
helij 7y ago
As a manager as well as a human being I am interested in my co-workers and how they feel, their family, etc. so I don't really 'get' your negativity. Can you point some of the bullcrap on the list. There might be a way to rephrase some of the questions to make them not bullcrap. I think 1on1 is great. I was at the receiving end and now at giving end. When I did 1on1 with my manager I always felt good afterwards but I was always 100% honest in my answers. The issues I see are if one of the two is not completely honest and that is a completely different issue not solvable by 1on1 but needs to be addressed within orgazination.
- stephc_int13 7y ago
  As a manager as well as a human being, you shouldn't have to ask those questions during a 1:1, the well being of your team should be something you're observing from the inside. And, more importantly, you should not delegate the responsibility of flagging it when something is wrong. You should know without asking.
  - scarface74 7y ago
    No as an employee the last thing I want is to constantly having to read between the lines. Just be up front and tell me about issues.
  - rwilson4 7y ago
    Early on as a manager I made the mistake of assuming I knew what was going on in someone’s head just by working closely with them. I was wrong. You can’t even just directly ask because of the complicated dynamics. The best way I have found is frequent conversations that challenge people to dig down into their values and perspectives. Lists like this one are a good starting point, but as others have said genuine empathy is required.
- artsyca 7y ago
  The very idea that there are two ends is your fallacy bro you are already putting yourself in the magnanimous role of giving something A 1:1 is inherently a meeting of minds where there is no power imbalance and genuine trust can develop The way you make it sound is like the CIA giving mandatory lie detector tests where one person is strapped to a chair and the other is taking notes I'm calling false corporate bullshit as a human being
deleted 7y ago
[deleted]
artsyca 7y ago
I'm with you 1000% I hate one on ones they're for the manager caste to wash their hands of the blood from the front lines and find ways to sharpen their knives while you confess all your sins I'd like to see an organization where the manager role consists of whipping boys for leadership who can be pummeled gladiator style for fun or profit
DyslexicAtheist 7y ago
it's like talking to a superior who poses as a psychologist without any training in it. lots of power to the manager and an invitation for abuse. pretty much the reason why I'd never slave as an employee. sorry you're being downvoted. it seems there are many here who have underlings and therefore benefit from such a farce.
- deleted 7y ago
  [deleted]
- scarface74 7y ago
  You’re always answerable to someone - clients, investors, the board. But even barring that, “just don’t work for anyone else” is not actionable.
- deleted 7y ago
  [deleted]

saagarjha 7y ago

What kind of questions would you ask?

yankit 7y ago
I especially like these 2: - what we as a company doing wrong? - name 10 things which can kill our business?

KingOfCoders 7y ago

What question in particular do you find not appropriate?

dijit 7y ago
“What did you want to be when you grow up” feels a bit out of touch.
- KingOfCoders 7y ago
  Yes might be, and I would agree. Although it could be a great opener for finding out what the person wants. I have often found it the hardest thing to help find out what the person I had 1on1s with wanted to become (or not, e.g. a manager). Sometimes people have a clear vision, sometimes it took a year. Everyone was happier though.
- yankit 7y ago
  I guess it depends on what kind of connection you have with your manager. I saw managers who would rather fire people if they feel they would be happier ion another place.
stephc_int13 7y ago
The list would be way too long. In my opinion, the so-called 1 on 1 meeting should only be used when an employee is clearly on the wrong trajectory and a course correction is needed. Good feedback is difficult, what I've seen was very often high noise and low signal. Forcing feedback when not necessary will not lead to added value for the company, only mildly boring and stressful waste of time, in the best case.
- helij 7y ago
  Ha! But you can prevent the wrong trajectory by acting before. And, one of the ways to do that is honest conversation with your co-worker.
  - stephc_int13 7y ago
    As soon as a wrong trajectory is detected, yes, feedback is needed. But not before.
    - lonelappde 7y ago
      How often is someone on the perfect trajectory without ever discussing their concerns or desires?
- ebiester 7y ago
  You don’t ask all of them at once - one or two of them may get used in a week. Feedback comes because you’re talking on a regular (weekly or bi-weekly) basis. If the employee is on the wrong trajectory, you’ve waited far too long to talk!

pseudoramble 7y ago

Do you not like the substance of the questions, or do you not like the delivery of the questions in this list? After reading through a small sample, I agree with you that if you asked these questions verbatim it would be ridiculous. And this list is kinda massive, so there are probably some that truly are not useful. The substance behind some of the questions could be useful IMO. One would need some rapport and context to use them. If they were reworded and delivered in ways that made more sense for those people, it could be helpful.

ratiolat 7y ago

Sarcasm and cynicism are signs of burnout. If ones arrives there, change to a job which actually is satisfying for you. No need to spend yourself and others on unhappy job.

fs111 7y ago
lol, they are a sign of experience, not burnout
dchyrdvh 7y ago
Apathy is a sign of burnout.

marcinzm 7y ago

Your manager asking is a sign they're trying to help you and understand you. You can rebuff that but then you shouldn't wonder in the future why your job isn't going the way you want it to (and why your coworkers aren't having the same issues).

cek 7y ago

Wow, you are either a troll or clueless. There is no more powerful form of ensuring manager/employee alignment than 1:1 meetings.

stephc_int13 7y ago
I've co-founded companies, I've led teams and been CEO of a small video game studio. As a manager, I never felt the need to bother anyone with 1:1 meetings. I think it is very easy to shoot yourself in the foot with feedback, this is a difficult art. And I think the best strategy is to use feedback only to deal with outliers, ie exceptional or catastrophic achievements.
- hk__2 7y ago
  > As a manager, I never felt the need to bother anyone with 1:1 meetings. How do you collect feedback then?
  - stephc_int13 7y ago
    Talking with people in an informal way, over lunch, work meetings (brainstorm) and direct day-to-day conversations.
    - joshuamorton 7y ago
      So you make an effort to take time out of your day for informal, one on one conversations with members of your team? Over lunch, and directly in passing?
- pvorb 7y ago
  I think it's important to give feedback to employees that behave like you'd expect, too. Otherwise they might wonder if they are doing something wrong and change their behavior.
- Insanity 7y ago
  I've worked for managers that did and didn't do 1:1 meetings. At some places I've missed them - because the managers were out of touch with the team. In other places where there were no 1:1 but a lot of 'hallway conversations' that seemed to replace them. So they had an 'finger on the pulse' of the team. That was pretty great - because of how informal it was and it worked. I've also had great 1:1s though. So YMMV I guess, but it's hard to generalize. I think a lot depends on the company culture - some companies might benefit from them while others don't. There's no golden rule.

helij 7y ago

As a manager as well as a human being I am interested in my co-workers and how they feel, their family, etc. so I don't really 'get' your negativity. Can you point some of the bullcrap on the list. There might be a way to rephrase some of the questions to make them not bullcrap. I think 1on1 is great. I was at the receiving end and now at giving end. When I did 1on1 with my manager I always felt good afterwards but I was always 100% honest in my answers. The issues I see are if one of the two is not completely honest and that is a completely different issue not solvable by 1on1 but needs to be addressed within orgazination.

stephc_int13 7y ago
As a manager as well as a human being, you shouldn't have to ask those questions during a 1:1, the well being of your team should be something you're observing from the inside. And, more importantly, you should not delegate the responsibility of flagging it when something is wrong. You should know without asking.
- scarface74 7y ago
  No as an employee the last thing I want is to constantly having to read between the lines. Just be up front and tell me about issues.
- rwilson4 7y ago
  Early on as a manager I made the mistake of assuming I knew what was going on in someone’s head just by working closely with them. I was wrong. You can’t even just directly ask because of the complicated dynamics. The best way I have found is frequent conversations that challenge people to dig down into their values and perspectives. Lists like this one are a good starting point, but as others have said genuine empathy is required.
artsyca 7y ago
The very idea that there are two ends is your fallacy bro you are already putting yourself in the magnanimous role of giving something A 1:1 is inherently a meeting of minds where there is no power imbalance and genuine trust can develop The way you make it sound is like the CIA giving mandatory lie detector tests where one person is strapped to a chair and the other is taking notes I'm calling false corporate bullshit as a human being

deleted 7y ago

[deleted]

artsyca 7y ago

I'm with you 1000% I hate one on ones they're for the manager caste to wash their hands of the blood from the front lines and find ways to sharpen their knives while you confess all your sins I'd like to see an organization where the manager role consists of whipping boys for leadership who can be pummeled gladiator style for fun or profit

DyslexicAtheist 7y ago

it's like talking to a superior who poses as a psychologist without any training in it. lots of power to the manager and an invitation for abuse. pretty much the reason why I'd never slave as an employee. sorry you're being downvoted. it seems there are many here who have underlings and therefore benefit from such a farce.

deleted 7y ago
[deleted]
scarface74 7y ago
You’re always answerable to someone - clients, investors, the board. But even barring that, “just don’t work for anyone else” is not actionable.
deleted 7y ago
[deleted]