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At one point, my parents bought a toilet from Amazon, and got along with it a 12-foot long balance beam. Trying to return it was a bit of an ordeal: https://k

At one point, my parents bought a toilet from Amazon, and got along with it a 12-foot long balance beam. Trying to return it was a bit of an ordeal: https://kkeeter.wordpress.com/2014/06/02/dear_amazon/ https://kkeeter.wordpress.com/2014/06/02/dear_amazon/

roel_v 7y ago
Loved that. This quote just sums up customer support in 2020 (and, apparently, also in 2014): Me 'Hi- I just called about a 12 foot balance beam delivered to me – along with my toilet – in error. Are you the one I talked to?' 'No' Me- 'Excellent!'
- deleted 7y ago
  [deleted]
- balladeer 7y ago
  I wish I could get such to the point responses (as simple as "No") while interacting with customer care.
  - hyperdimension 7y ago
    Thank you very much for commenting, and I'm sorry to hear about your concern, 'balladeer. I empathize with your desire for short, pithy responses to questions posed to customer care, and hope that you're having an otherwise great day. Thank you for being a loyal HN customer. Can I get your account number to get started?
colejohnson66 7y ago
There’s actually laws regarding stuff sent to you in error. Basically, they can’t ask you to return it unless you offer. Hence why there’s probably no formalized process for it.
- userbinator 7y ago
  It should also not come as a surprise that a company whose process is highly optimised to move product in one direction has problems dealing with unusual situations in the other direction.
  - eh78ssxv2f 7y ago
    This article is also from 2014. I wonder if the return process is smoother now.
    - mcpeepants 7y ago
      normal returns are pretty painless - I order thing, I get exactly that thing, I return thing. I imagine there's still no formal process in place for "oops we sent you a thing, keep it or throw it out or whatever"
      - User23 7y ago
        Returns are super painless now. You just click a few times on a webpage and then go to your local UPS store (or whatever you picked) show them your phone so they can scan the QR code you got sent, and then hand them the item.
        fredophile 7y ago
        Returns of things they know they sent are painless. In the linked article there was no tracking showing the balance beam and that caused most of the problem.
      - HenryBemis 7y ago
        I had a similar experience with a hairdryer (I am bald). They refunded the cost of the item I actually ordered (not a hairdryer)(I am bald). They offered that I keep the hairdryer (still bald). They were insanely against picking it up/returning it. I guess that in their model of profitability they have included "items gone rogue" (returns are calculated in the financial statements, auditors "love" returns - especially for purchases made on year -1 and being returned on year 0)(I assume write-offs hurt less the bottom line/the auditors are less angry as long as it is not a fraudulent write-off). Back to the story, a month later they sent me the item I ordered, free of charge and a friend of mine got a lovely hairdryer on her birthday. And I honestly didn't know that hairdryers can cost more than £€$100!!!
abhgh 7y ago
Amazon accidentally shipped me a book a few months ago, by getting one digit in the address wrong. I pinged Amazon to return it - but I got the same response, "why don't you keep it?". I said I didn't want to, and this went on for a while, and I realized that they aren't going to to take it back. They said they were going to ship another copy to the correct address anyway. A day after the conversation, I was still not satisfied so I decided to walk down to this other house to drop off the book. Unfortunately no one was in when I made my visit, and I didn't want to drop off the book without speaking to them (it'd have been confusing if they had received some kind of an apology mail from Amazon in the interim etc). I had to immediately leave for a long business trip right after, and, well, the book is still with me. I didn't bother after my return - I convinced myself it was too late. But mine was a book, yours was a beam. So I got off easy I guess :-)
- jopsen 7y ago
  Why borther don't they just throw returns in the trash anyways? But giving an incorrectly addressed package to your neighbor seems like a general good idea :)
  - rwmj 7y ago
    No, they auction off returns in mixed boxes. Here's a video of someone who bought one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTaYet07Ioo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTaYet07Ioo
    - siberianbear 7y ago
      I realize that HN frowns on +1 types of comments. But I nevertheless feel obliged to add that I laughed my ass off watching that video. The woman that did the video has a great sense of humor.
  - OJFord 7y ago
    No, as I understand it they sell job lots of returns on a pallet or whatever, by weight or volume I'm not sure. More valuable/branded stuff is sold for what it is though, and direct to consumer, in the 'Amazon Warehouse' section - at least, iirc it advertises itself as products returned or damaged in the warehouse.
mikorym 7y ago
It was not until I read through the whole article and saw the picture that, finally, my mind was at rest knowing that someone didn't order a 12-foot long balance beam to try to somehow put into their roof.
jaclaz 7y ago
The "Update 3" made my day, thanks for posting that. >Amazon is now making arrangements with CEVA – some top secret group which is responsible for finding homes for lost balance beams and other unwanted and unusually sized packages.
toper-centage 7y ago
I ordered a mattress off of amazon. 2 days later, I get the money back on my account. Not wanting mto be banned from amazon, and thinking maybe the payment bounced on my account, I called customer support. "I think I accidentally received a refund of my mattress.", I said. "you want to return your mattress? I will send you a shipping label." they helped. "NO! I have the mattress, and want to keep it, but also got the money back. I want to return the money!". "OK, I will contact the seller to take care of your refund." "you don't understand! I want to return the money. The seller accidentally returned the money after delivering my mattress!." They finally understood and asked the seller. The seller didn't refund anything. Amazon didn't either. But I have both the money and the mattress to this day. Go figure.
- theshrike79 7y ago
  At some point it's cheaper (and better PR) just to let people keep the money and product. Handling the refund costs hours of work and might end up being more expensive than the return/refund.

roel_v 7y ago

Loved that. This quote just sums up customer support in 2020 (and, apparently, also in 2014): Me 'Hi- I just called about a 12 foot balance beam delivered to me – along with my toilet – in error. Are you the one I talked to?' 'No' Me- 'Excellent!'

deleted 7y ago
[deleted]
balladeer 7y ago
I wish I could get such to the point responses (as simple as "No") while interacting with customer care.
- hyperdimension 7y ago
  Thank you very much for commenting, and I'm sorry to hear about your concern, 'balladeer. I empathize with your desire for short, pithy responses to questions posed to customer care, and hope that you're having an otherwise great day. Thank you for being a loyal HN customer. Can I get your account number to get started?

colejohnson66 7y ago

There’s actually laws regarding stuff sent to you in error. Basically, they can’t ask you to return it unless you offer. Hence why there’s probably no formalized process for it.

userbinator 7y ago
It should also not come as a surprise that a company whose process is highly optimised to move product in one direction has problems dealing with unusual situations in the other direction.
- eh78ssxv2f 7y ago
  This article is also from 2014. I wonder if the return process is smoother now.
  - mcpeepants 7y ago
    normal returns are pretty painless - I order thing, I get exactly that thing, I return thing. I imagine there's still no formal process in place for "oops we sent you a thing, keep it or throw it out or whatever"
    - User23 7y ago
      Returns are super painless now. You just click a few times on a webpage and then go to your local UPS store (or whatever you picked) show them your phone so they can scan the QR code you got sent, and then hand them the item.
      - fredophile 7y ago
        Returns of things they know they sent are painless. In the linked article there was no tracking showing the balance beam and that caused most of the problem.
    - HenryBemis 7y ago
      I had a similar experience with a hairdryer (I am bald). They refunded the cost of the item I actually ordered (not a hairdryer)(I am bald). They offered that I keep the hairdryer (still bald). They were insanely against picking it up/returning it. I guess that in their model of profitability they have included "items gone rogue" (returns are calculated in the financial statements, auditors "love" returns - especially for purchases made on year -1 and being returned on year 0)(I assume write-offs hurt less the bottom line/the auditors are less angry as long as it is not a fraudulent write-off). Back to the story, a month later they sent me the item I ordered, free of charge and a friend of mine got a lovely hairdryer on her birthday. And I honestly didn't know that hairdryers can cost more than £€$100!!!

abhgh 7y ago

Amazon accidentally shipped me a book a few months ago, by getting one digit in the address wrong. I pinged Amazon to return it - but I got the same response, "why don't you keep it?". I said I didn't want to, and this went on for a while, and I realized that they aren't going to to take it back. They said they were going to ship another copy to the correct address anyway. A day after the conversation, I was still not satisfied so I decided to walk down to this other house to drop off the book. Unfortunately no one was in when I made my visit, and I didn't want to drop off the book without speaking to them (it'd have been confusing if they had received some kind of an apology mail from Amazon in the interim etc). I had to immediately leave for a long business trip right after, and, well, the book is still with me. I didn't bother after my return - I convinced myself it was too late. But mine was a book, yours was a beam. So I got off easy I guess :-)

jopsen 7y ago
Why borther don't they just throw returns in the trash anyways? But giving an incorrectly addressed package to your neighbor seems like a general good idea :)
- rwmj 7y ago
  No, they auction off returns in mixed boxes. Here's a video of someone who bought one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTaYet07Ioo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTaYet07Ioo
  - siberianbear 7y ago
    I realize that HN frowns on +1 types of comments. But I nevertheless feel obliged to add that I laughed my ass off watching that video. The woman that did the video has a great sense of humor.
- OJFord 7y ago
  No, as I understand it they sell job lots of returns on a pallet or whatever, by weight or volume I'm not sure. More valuable/branded stuff is sold for what it is though, and direct to consumer, in the 'Amazon Warehouse' section - at least, iirc it advertises itself as products returned or damaged in the warehouse.

mikorym 7y ago

It was not until I read through the whole article and saw the picture that, finally, my mind was at rest knowing that someone didn't order a 12-foot long balance beam to try to somehow put into their roof.

jaclaz 7y ago

The "Update 3" made my day, thanks for posting that. >Amazon is now making arrangements with CEVA – some top secret group which is responsible for finding homes for lost balance beams and other unwanted and unusually sized packages.

toper-centage 7y ago

I ordered a mattress off of amazon. 2 days later, I get the money back on my account. Not wanting mto be banned from amazon, and thinking maybe the payment bounced on my account, I called customer support. "I think I accidentally received a refund of my mattress.", I said. "you want to return your mattress? I will send you a shipping label." they helped. "NO! I have the mattress, and want to keep it, but also got the money back. I want to return the money!". "OK, I will contact the seller to take care of your refund." "you don't understand! I want to return the money. The seller accidentally returned the money after delivering my mattress!." They finally understood and asked the seller. The seller didn't refund anything. Amazon didn't either. But I have both the money and the mattress to this day. Go figure.

theshrike79 7y ago
At some point it's cheaper (and better PR) just to let people keep the money and product. Handling the refund costs hours of work and might end up being more expensive than the return/refund.