We have straight up told extended family either not to buy big gifts for birthday/Christmas, or, alternatively, have said that they can buy those gifts for thei

We have straight up told extended family either not to buy big gifts for birthday/Christmas, or, alternatively, have said that they can buy those gifts for their house so the kids can play with those toys when we visit. It's been pretty helpful. We've also suggested getting the kids things like yearly memberships to local museums or the aquarium in lieu of gifts.