The solution might be not to increase the number of things that define you, but to sublimate your ego (used loosely here to define what you “believe” yourself t

The solution might be not to increase the number of things that define you, but to sublimate your ego (used loosely here to define what you “believe” yourself to be) into larger circles of identification. For example, a (wo)man (I’ll be using male gendered pronouns here but do not intend to be male-specific) motivated to feed his family has a larger circle of ID than when just looking to feed himself. Thus he is willing to sacrifice the “littler” self for the “bigger” self. Most people end this growth (also known as vairagya in Sanskrit) at the level of family, but it’s possible to keep expanding upwards to community, country, humans, living beings etc. Perturbations at the lower level from wherever you’re standing do not affect you because you’re standing at a higher level. A more expanded viewpoint, if you will. Ego has become finer and more refined.