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IANAN, but living abroad when I was about 25 really improved my humility. I'm used to being quick-witted, knowledgable, and generally good with people. When I g
by happimess 7y ago
IANAN, but living abroad when I was about 25 really improved my humility. I'm used to being quick-witted, knowledgable, and generally good with people. When I got to a place where English is not the default language, I was essentially an idiot---I was confused a lot, unable to make jokes, and little kids laughed at my attempts to, say, order a gyro.
It all clicked when I was lamenting it to my girlfriend, who said (with real affection), "well, how much of what you say is actually valuable?" Right then I realized how much of my time I spent trying to convince people how quick-witted, knowledgable, and easy with people I am.
Now I talk less, let jokes (even good jokes!) go unsaid, and am better with people.
- calebm 7y agoA lion doesn't have to tell anyone he's a lion.
- deleted 7y ago[deleted]
- ekabod 7y agoall lions are lions , so it doesn't apply in our case.
- Beermotor 7y agoI've heard it phrased as "a rich man doesn't have to tell you he's rich".
- randycupertino 7y agoSame with "new money" vs "old money" - the richest guy on our block drives a Hyundai because he likes it and says they are good little cars. Meanwhile our other neighbor with 5 cars (Mercedes, Tesla SUV, a dune buggy, a truck to tow his boat and some classic car that's under a tarp) has a tax lien on his house.
- deleted 7y ago[deleted]
- luckyscs 7y agoDon't Rob the world of your good jokes, friend, I always appreciate a laugh.
- happimess 7y agoDon't worry, there are still plenty of jokes. I just realized that my jokes were shutting off other people who might be saying something, or redirecting the conversation away from something interesting. So now I just stifle them if I can tell that someone else (especially someone less talkative than me) has something they want to say. Usually I explain them to my wife hours later, and at least _I_ get a kick out of them.
- Rastonbury 7y agoJokes are great if they make people laugh, think you've overthought that part!
- anonytrary 7y agoOn the contrary, I sort of dislike how normalized being quiet and keeping thoughts to yourself has become IRL. I find solace in cracking somewhat absurd jokes and being somewhat absurd. That's what I have to do to make it through the day. If that makes me bad with some people, then maybe that's their problem. I think the most important thing I never realized is that not everyone will like you, and it is a complete waste of time to try to get people to like you. It is better to be hated by some and loved by some, then to be liked by all.
- happimess 7y agoI think you misunderstand me. I'm not afraid to let my freak flag fly. I just realized that I wasn't leaving a lot of space for other people in group conversations.