3 ms·

A therapist is trained to spot things you miss. It's like asking, "what does a junior engineer get out of being mentored by a senior engineer that they couldn'

A therapist is trained to spot things you miss. It's like asking, "what does a junior engineer get out of being mentored by a senior engineer that they couldn't just figure out by coding or reading blogs?" A therapist brings things like context, breadth of knowledge, and honesty. I felt like the therapist wasn't incentivized to sugar coat things to spare my feelings, something close friends and family might do. I am not sure about seeing one for 5 years, though. The point of a therapist is to make themselves unnecessary, in my opinion - they're supposed to give you the tools needed to do exactly what you're saying people should do - understand their behavior and change it.

sounds 7y ago
I agree that seeing a therapist for 5 years may indicate they're not actually helping you progress. I could offer a different data point, but since it's all subjective experience anyway, just make your own call. I've enjoyed long-term therapy because I found more things I wanted to work on. Ironically, it is my therapist who reviews things on a regular schedule and asks, "why are you coming to therapy now?" (If your therapist isn't doing that, maybe that's a red flag that you are being taken advantage of?)
- Fnoord 7y ago
  > I agree that seeing a therapist for 5 years may indicate they're not actually helping you progress. It may also indicate you really need the therapy. That's the conundrum. You need sometimes assess (reflect), possibly with your therapist, how they are aiding you effectively. In The Netherlands, there are waiting lists for psychiatrists (and a shortage), as well as waiting lists for specialized psychologists; hence they get paid either way. They'd rather have a client who benefits from their therapy.
munificent 7y ago
If you think of a therapist as less "surgeon for the brain" who exists to fix issues and more like "personal trainer for the brain", then it makes more sense to have one long-term. It's less about fixing things that are profoundly broken and more about incrementally trying to make the most of the brain you're given.

sounds 7y ago

I agree that seeing a therapist for 5 years may indicate they're not actually helping you progress. I could offer a different data point, but since it's all subjective experience anyway, just make your own call. I've enjoyed long-term therapy because I found more things I wanted to work on. Ironically, it is my therapist who reviews things on a regular schedule and asks, "why are you coming to therapy now?" (If your therapist isn't doing that, maybe that's a red flag that you are being taken advantage of?)

Fnoord 7y ago
> I agree that seeing a therapist for 5 years may indicate they're not actually helping you progress. It may also indicate you really need the therapy. That's the conundrum. You need sometimes assess (reflect), possibly with your therapist, how they are aiding you effectively. In The Netherlands, there are waiting lists for psychiatrists (and a shortage), as well as waiting lists for specialized psychologists; hence they get paid either way. They'd rather have a client who benefits from their therapy.

munificent 7y ago

If you think of a therapist as less "surgeon for the brain" who exists to fix issues and more like "personal trainer for the brain", then it makes more sense to have one long-term. It's less about fixing things that are profoundly broken and more about incrementally trying to make the most of the brain you're given.