4 ms·
> Familiarity breeds contempt. This is actually encoded into a common expression in Nothern Sotho. In the infinitive go tlwaela the meaning is to get use to or
by mikorym 7y ago
> Familiarity breeds contempt.
This is actually encoded into a common expression in Nothern Sotho. In the infinitive go tlwaela the meaning is to get use to or to grow accustomed to something. But when you say O a ntlwaela, as in: "You are getting used to me," you are actually telling the person that they are being contemptuous.
In fact, this principle is so well developed in the Northern Sotho language that you can even use the phrase for someone that is not in fact accustomed to you. For example, I was at the recycling site the other day and this guy came up to me and was pissed that I came in and didn't do what he wanted me to do (which could have been a fair objection) but he also as a side remark called me racist. To which I responded, "O a ntlwaela." In context, what I am really saying would be that he is stereotyping me. His response, realising he made a mistake, was to just deny it without substantiation, as in "Ke go tlwaela bjang?" Essentially he was saying: "How am I being familiar with you?"
The answer was of course that he was calling me racist because I reminded him of someone else; i.e., a steriotype he was used to. In any case, I did not point this out any further and just left.
- idclip 7y agoMe and my partner are working on actually hacking this to increase love, respeft abd compassion in our relationship. I am discovering that i can only love her as deeply as i can love myself - what you said about the “getting used to” - i will Forward to her. In a way, we must never get used to each other. And that’s deep work ... Sorry you also were victim of projection .. its tge mechanism that holds us hostage as a species - and threatens us with war even. My ex called me sexist and racist as well - i knew she was a good person, and i know i wasnt those things, and i even understood her father trauma which made her say those things, but it still hurts. Its our job to contain all this .. it really helps growth. Did you consider reading books about children upbringing psychology? Its very helpful!
- mikorym 7y ago> children upbringing psychology Is this psychology that focuses on when you were a child and how you were raised (as opposed to child psychology)?
- idclip 7y agoMhmm, im not a complete expert. Just a dude who reads books. I understand child paychology i in the “playing and imagination” - attachment theory model - What i actually meant is a rott parenting book, something such as the informed parent perhaps! A friend sweats by NLP, but i find it dubios myself.