There's a quote I like that goes something like: It's not reality that we suffer from, but our perception of reality. I find that helpful. We all had "actually

There's a quote I like that goes something like: It's not reality that we suffer from, but our perception of reality. I find that helpful. We all had "actually it wasn't that bad" moments which basically mean "I suffered for no good reason". You can train yourself to anticipate these moments in advance. Imagine that this thing your stressed about fails miserably and the worst possible consequences unfold. What then? What will you do? What if you miss the deadline and the project fails and your boss gets mad and you're fired. What will you do? Will you land on your feet eventually? Maybe you'll actually enjoy some free time and then find a better job or work full time on that thing you keep postponing? What if your relationship deteriorates and your s/o ends up leaves you? Will you land on your feet eventually? Would you manage to find happiness again? I think that realizing that I'll be alright even in the extreme case, is very reassuring and actually frees me to be more focused on the job at hand and do it better, because I don't need to waste brain-cycles on stressing on what might otherwise feels like a live-or-die situation. Your relationships will be much better if you know deep down that you don't need that specific person to be happy, but that rather its your choice. Btw, if you feel that you actually wont be ok in some scenario that your stress is warranted! But then you should probably aim to fix that unhealthy attachment because you are probably wrong...