I've been in a similar situation, and would recommend to take some time off and find a good therapist if that's possible for you. In the Netherlands it's commo

I've been in a similar situation, and would recommend to take some time off and find a good therapist if that's possible for you. In the Netherlands it's common to take sick leave and get paid 75% if you're sick for more than 2 months. Insurance covers the sick leave for your employer. I've been sitting at home for over a year now, working on my mental health, and just took on a new job. I can not recommend a burnout to anyone, for some outsiders it seems like I had a year-long vacation. This was definitely not the case, I hated it. It has been very healthy though in retrospect. Before my burnout I hated myself and felt like a complete failure, I thought everything was my fault. I can highly recommend therapy as well, I've been suffering from depression for over 10 years, and finally sought out help last summer. It's trial and error, but for the first time it feels like I regained some control over my thoughts/life, and make sense of my behaviour. In the period towards my total burnout (panic attacks/fatigue/depression), I was very irritable, emotionally unstable, drank too much, started taking drugs to handle the stress of working 50-70hrs a week and dealing with my life and deteriorating relationship with a suicidal and junkie boyfriend, amongst other things. Taking time off, focussing on myself completely, breaking up with my boyfriend, cooking, walking and reading helped a lot. Doing small positive things. I cook for my ex now once a week, I like to see still him and just want to let him know I care about him, also it doesn't take that much energy and benefits us both. Start saying no to people, define your boundaries, all that matters is you! Listen to your body. All the best!