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I'm just starting to get a handle on this now that I hit 30. We look to successful people to see how they manage their time, thinking that by copying their rout

I'm just starting to get a handle on this now that I hit 30. We look to successful people to see how they manage their time, thinking that by copying their routines and habits as inputs, we will be also be able to yield some of their success as outputs; however, we will never be able to copy the procedure that returns that output (consciousness, mindset, motivations, neurology, purpose, talents, traumas, upbringing, values). Ultimately, I think the answer comes from ridding yourself of distractions, and asking yourself the question - "What do I want out of life?" If you can answer that question, you will also be able to manage your time efficiently, because you will always be directed toward that purpose. Without knowing your individual purpose in life, you will go through life checking the boxes that biology and society put before you. With that said, it can be hard to settle with realization that you aren't personally driven to do anything that will make you an idol among your peers; you can finally stop trivializing everything in your life and just enjoy it, enjoy the process, enjoy the journey.

vorpalhex 7y ago
> we will never be able to copy the procedure that returns that output (consciousness, mindset, motivations, neurology, purpose, talents, traumas, upbringing, values). This particular claim feels too pessimistic to me. Sure you obviously can't copy someone's upbringing or traumas (nor should you), but in general these traits are trainable. Someone else might have a leg up on being born with greater charisma or focus, but those are generally trainable things with effort. > Ultimately, I think the answer comes from ridding yourself of distractions, and asking yourself the question - "What do I want out of life?" I agree with this claim generally. You won't rid yourself of all distractions, but you can engage with them efficiently and prioritize what matters. > Without knowing your individual purpose in life Purpose isn't a goal like "be able to deadlift 400lbs". It's more of a goal like "improve my weightlifting". It's a moving goal post and at times you'll have it more in view and other times less in view. > it can be hard to settle with realization that you aren't personally driven to do anything Sometimes people do have drive to do a thing, but more often they're chasing what they genuinely enjoy and that is what gives them the strength to push through difficulties. Don't feel like you need some deep world changing mission statement - it's probably enough to act with genuine, directed enjoyment and curiosity.
- dhshahsndeisjwn 7y ago
  > it's probably enough to act with genuine, directed enjoyment and curiosity. This is true, but I think you are seriously underestimating how difficult this can be, and how easy it is to lose track of what it actually, genuinely is that gives you enjoyment.
  - ck425 7y ago
    That's the more important point here. Figuring out what gives you enjoyment and motivation is HARD and we shouldn't beat ourselves up if we haven't figured it out yet. The process of figuring it out is messy and chaotic but so long as we're making some progress we should be kind to ourselves.
  - Rapzid 7y ago
    I would go a step further and say it's just another form of making the exception the rule. People will point to a handful that came up out of poverty and say "Look! They did it, everyone else could too but they are just lazy. It's their choice to live in poverty." That sort of thinking is thoroughly rejected in large segments of the population now. Well, it's not really a stretch at all IMHO to extend that to most things self-help and growth wise.
koheripbal 7y ago
> I think the answer comes from ridding yourself of distractions, and asking yourself the question - "What do I want out of life?" I think focusing on the far out end-goal/meaning of life, is actually just another fun distraction. ...as are most time-management tools. Generally speaking, we know exactly what we need to get done, and the problem isn't figuring out the end goal, it is gaining the emotional strength to tackle the work we just don't want to do. There is a time for future planning (2yr/5yr/10yr/etc...) - and that's something we should all schedule for a future planning session. At 40, I'm still working on it. One thing I've noticed is the social component. Working alone is occasionally more efficient - but we are social creatures and being able to share your accomplishments and refine ideas with your teammates (whom you like and have a good friendship with) creates an ENORMOUS positive reinforcement. tldr: Be an important part of a highly interdependent and high functioning happy team. There's just nothing else like it.
- ck425 7y ago
  > Generally speaking, we know exactly what we need to get done I don't agree. I still don't know what I really want to achieve in life. I have a better idea but honestly a big part of that better idea is realizing the things I thought I wanted aren't things I actually want.
  - criddell 7y ago
    Thinking about what I want to achieve in life reminds me that I should buy a lotto ticket more often. What I want from life isn't associated in any way with what I do to earn money and it's my need to earn money that stops me from living the life I want.
lcall 7y ago
You make some good points; I also think we can (and need to) learn from others. As I wrote in another somewhat related discussion (https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22096571 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22096571) recently: To me, the most important thing is to fit one's career in with one's overall purpose and goals in life. Like, to make sure the ladder of success is not leaning against the wrong wall (Covey). I've written much more including a link to the 7 habits wikipedia page (a simple site, no ads or JS): http://lukecall.net/e-9223372036854588981.html http://lukecall.net/e-9223372036854588981.html , in what I hope is a very browseable/skimmable format. Edit: Also I have written about how the purpose of life translates to tasks, activities, etc. And it helps me very much to have a daily routine and thought habits that help me fulfill my goals, which I have been working on for a long time. I guess I would feel somewhat lost without those things, and others.
stronglikedan 7y ago
> If you can answer that question, you will also be able to manage your time efficiently, because you will always be directed toward that purpose. I have answered that question, and I still procrastinate by negotiating myself out of progressing towards that goal, and then regret doing that but do it again the next time. It may be a valid solution for some, but it's not one size fits all (same as all of the solutions proposed). The real trick is to try all the proposed solutions, and find what works for you.

vorpalhex 7y ago

> we will never be able to copy the procedure that returns that output (consciousness, mindset, motivations, neurology, purpose, talents, traumas, upbringing, values). This particular claim feels too pessimistic to me. Sure you obviously can't copy someone's upbringing or traumas (nor should you), but in general these traits are trainable. Someone else might have a leg up on being born with greater charisma or focus, but those are generally trainable things with effort. > Ultimately, I think the answer comes from ridding yourself of distractions, and asking yourself the question - "What do I want out of life?" I agree with this claim generally. You won't rid yourself of all distractions, but you can engage with them efficiently and prioritize what matters. > Without knowing your individual purpose in life Purpose isn't a goal like "be able to deadlift 400lbs". It's more of a goal like "improve my weightlifting". It's a moving goal post and at times you'll have it more in view and other times less in view. > it can be hard to settle with realization that you aren't personally driven to do anything Sometimes people do have drive to do a thing, but more often they're chasing what they genuinely enjoy and that is what gives them the strength to push through difficulties. Don't feel like you need some deep world changing mission statement - it's probably enough to act with genuine, directed enjoyment and curiosity.

dhshahsndeisjwn 7y ago
> it's probably enough to act with genuine, directed enjoyment and curiosity. This is true, but I think you are seriously underestimating how difficult this can be, and how easy it is to lose track of what it actually, genuinely is that gives you enjoyment.
- ck425 7y ago
  That's the more important point here. Figuring out what gives you enjoyment and motivation is HARD and we shouldn't beat ourselves up if we haven't figured it out yet. The process of figuring it out is messy and chaotic but so long as we're making some progress we should be kind to ourselves.
- Rapzid 7y ago
  I would go a step further and say it's just another form of making the exception the rule. People will point to a handful that came up out of poverty and say "Look! They did it, everyone else could too but they are just lazy. It's their choice to live in poverty." That sort of thinking is thoroughly rejected in large segments of the population now. Well, it's not really a stretch at all IMHO to extend that to most things self-help and growth wise.

koheripbal 7y ago

> I think the answer comes from ridding yourself of distractions, and asking yourself the question - "What do I want out of life?" I think focusing on the far out end-goal/meaning of life, is actually just another fun distraction. ...as are most time-management tools. Generally speaking, we know exactly what we need to get done, and the problem isn't figuring out the end goal, it is gaining the emotional strength to tackle the work we just don't want to do. There is a time for future planning (2yr/5yr/10yr/etc...) - and that's something we should all schedule for a future planning session. At 40, I'm still working on it. One thing I've noticed is the social component. Working alone is occasionally more efficient - but we are social creatures and being able to share your accomplishments and refine ideas with your teammates (whom you like and have a good friendship with) creates an ENORMOUS positive reinforcement. tldr: Be an important part of a highly interdependent and high functioning happy team. There's just nothing else like it.

ck425 7y ago
> Generally speaking, we know exactly what we need to get done I don't agree. I still don't know what I really want to achieve in life. I have a better idea but honestly a big part of that better idea is realizing the things I thought I wanted aren't things I actually want.
- criddell 7y ago
  Thinking about what I want to achieve in life reminds me that I should buy a lotto ticket more often. What I want from life isn't associated in any way with what I do to earn money and it's my need to earn money that stops me from living the life I want.

lcall 7y ago

You make some good points; I also think we can (and need to) learn from others. As I wrote in another somewhat related discussion (https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22096571 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=22096571) recently: To me, the most important thing is to fit one's career in with one's overall purpose and goals in life. Like, to make sure the ladder of success is not leaning against the wrong wall (Covey). I've written much more including a link to the 7 habits wikipedia page (a simple site, no ads or JS): http://lukecall.net/e-9223372036854588981.html http://lukecall.net/e-9223372036854588981.html , in what I hope is a very browseable/skimmable format. Edit: Also I have written about how the purpose of life translates to tasks, activities, etc. And it helps me very much to have a daily routine and thought habits that help me fulfill my goals, which I have been working on for a long time. I guess I would feel somewhat lost without those things, and others.

stronglikedan 7y ago

> If you can answer that question, you will also be able to manage your time efficiently, because you will always be directed toward that purpose. I have answered that question, and I still procrastinate by negotiating myself out of progressing towards that goal, and then regret doing that but do it again the next time. It may be a valid solution for some, but it's not one size fits all (same as all of the solutions proposed). The real trick is to try all the proposed solutions, and find what works for you.