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Going against your, and parents, commentary, this is a semi-accurate description of how I used to see myself: "I'd rather be right than popular, and I usually

Going against your, and parents, commentary, this is a semi-accurate description of how I used to see myself: "I'd rather be right than popular, and I usually am". But I mostly wasn't convincing, whether I was right or wrong. And that's what I'm continually working on. Being convincing is arguably more important than being right in the first place. And to be convincing you need to know your topic from a number of angles, and you need to know the audience you're playing to. But you also need to know whose worthy of convincing, because there are some (plenty) that won't be convinced either way, so don't waste your time on them - know a lost cause so as to avoid committing self-denial-of-service.

phreack 7y ago
To add to your very good insight, I believe that oftentimes it's not even a dichotomy. Being right does not give a right to be condescending about it, because it turns the conversation into emotional clashes by triggering a desire to oppose on the other. But the very bad thing about that philosophy is that it makes one tend to default to thinking that it's others that are inferior and can't handle the facts you see so clearly... so if it turns out you were not right in the end, we've got the worst case scenario -- Now you're not just preventing yourself from learning and improving (which should always be the goal), you've become just like a troll, an asshole who's wrong.
- cjslep 7y ago
  > Being right does not give a right to be condescending about it I agree. It takes discipline to be right without being righteous.
- chinesempire 7y ago
  > Being right does not give a right to be condescending Not to disagree, but, quoting the article, I'd like to "underscore the asymmetry" between people that are right and condescending VS people that are wrong, think they are right (or don't care if they are, most of the times) and are condescending just because they can or because that's the way they think you advance your career. They read somewhere that CEOs have a bad temper and imply that bad temper is necessary to become CEO.
watwut 7y ago
> Being convincing is arguably more important than being right in the first place. Only from selfish point of view. If you are wrong and convince people to be wrong too, you just very likely made world less good place. It is important to be right and double check yourself especially if you are able to be convincing.
- gjm11 7y ago
  Rightness comes in degrees. It can definitely be better to be _almost right_ but convincing than _completely right_ but unconvincing. In fact, all you need is to be _more right_ than people would be if you didn't convince them.

phreack 7y ago

To add to your very good insight, I believe that oftentimes it's not even a dichotomy. Being right does not give a right to be condescending about it, because it turns the conversation into emotional clashes by triggering a desire to oppose on the other. But the very bad thing about that philosophy is that it makes one tend to default to thinking that it's others that are inferior and can't handle the facts you see so clearly... so if it turns out you were not right in the end, we've got the worst case scenario -- Now you're not just preventing yourself from learning and improving (which should always be the goal), you've become just like a troll, an asshole who's wrong.

cjslep 7y ago
> Being right does not give a right to be condescending about it I agree. It takes discipline to be right without being righteous.
chinesempire 7y ago
> Being right does not give a right to be condescending Not to disagree, but, quoting the article, I'd like to "underscore the asymmetry" between people that are right and condescending VS people that are wrong, think they are right (or don't care if they are, most of the times) and are condescending just because they can or because that's the way they think you advance your career. They read somewhere that CEOs have a bad temper and imply that bad temper is necessary to become CEO.

watwut 7y ago

> Being convincing is arguably more important than being right in the first place. Only from selfish point of view. If you are wrong and convince people to be wrong too, you just very likely made world less good place. It is important to be right and double check yourself especially if you are able to be convincing.

gjm11 7y ago
Rightness comes in degrees. It can definitely be better to be _almost right_ but convincing than _completely right_ but unconvincing. In fact, all you need is to be _more right_ than people would be if you didn't convince them.