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My uncle has been an alcoholic / drug addict his entire adult life. Inherited the family dairy farm from my grandpa. Drove it into the ground. Eventually lost t
by war1025 7y ago
My uncle has been an alcoholic / drug addict his entire adult life. Inherited the family dairy farm from my grandpa. Drove it into the ground. Eventually lost the farm. Ended up living in a trailer on a plot of land he got from my grandpa.
My understanding is this trailer had electricity but no plumbing. He lived there for probably a decade. At some point he picked up a lady who I'm fairly certain is addicted to opiates.
This was all in northern Minnesota (gets real cold in the winter). Anyway, two winters ago, he couldn't be bothered to stoke the fire at night and ended up getting super bad frost bite on his feet. A few weeks later, he got both his feet amputated below the knees. Spent several months getting recovered.
In the meantime, the family had sold off Grandpa's house and land. Split evenly between the kids (6 of them). Gave him enough cash to build a little shed with proper plumbing and heating.
At some point this spring, he fell out of his wheelchair and his lady left him there for twelve hours of so. A friend happened to stop by and called the ambulance.
He's been on the brink of death for a good six months now. His esophagus was disconnected at some point (maybe still is?). He is basically riddled with health issues from a life spent making the wrong choices.
I think it's safe to say at this point he falls squarely in the "most expensive patients" category this article talked about.
Which is a long-winded way of saying, yes, my uncle is broken. But there was no obvious moment along the way where that happened. He had many opportunities and just chose to squander them.
It's sad. But it's also a messy story with no clean-cut snap your fingers solution.
- texasbigdata 7y agoFamily intervention 30 years ago and force him to rehab? Not sure if you read Knausgard but theres an analogous story with his father that you might find comfort wading through.
- Red_Leaves_Flyy 7y agoWho knows what they've tried. I would like to believe that no one is without the capacity to change. To believe that people can be born destined to squander, destroy, and consume without providing is a worldview that I cannot conceive. I believe we are all products of our environments with varying levels of ability. When one of us fails it is a reflection of us all. When one of us succeeds it is likewise a reflection. To deny our interconnectedness and interdependence is to ignorantly absolve ourselves of responsibility to treat each other fairly, and kindly. Anything less is textbook antisocial behavior. [1] Yet, such behavior is celebrated across all demographics. No wonder vulnerable and poor people are despairing. antisocial behavior is rampant in our world. These behaviors effect everyone, though the weight of these assaults increases as someone's resources and support network decreases. If the definition of antisocial behavior sounds familiar its because the evidence of these mentally ill people are everywhere. Virtually every company wantonly engages in these behaviors. As companies are a sum of their resources and employees (assuming resources like cars and buildings aren't sentient) it must be the employees choosing to engage in these behaviors. Whether someone overtly chooses to engage in antisocial behavior, allows antisocial behaviors to occur without protest, or protests and fails these actions have a waterfall of consequences that we all bare. Should we continue to deny our collective responsibility we shall obviously continue to suffer the consequences of our failures to treat those around us kindly and fairly. [1] https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/antisocial-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20353928 https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/antisocial-pe... ..."Disregard for right and wrong Persistent lying or deceit to exploit others. Being callous, cynical and disrespectful of others. Using charm or wit to manipulate others for personal gain or personal pleasure. Arrogance, a sense of superiority and being extremely opinionated. Recurring problems with the law, including criminal behavior. Repeatedly violating the rights of others through intimidation and dishonesty. Impulsiveness or failure to plan ahead. Hostility, significant irritability, agitation, aggression or violence. Lack of empathy for others and lack of remorse about harming others Unnecessary risk-taking or dangerous behavior with no regard for the safety of self or others. Poor or abusive relationships. Failure to consider the negative consequences of behavior or learn from them. Being consistently irresponsible and repeatedly failing to fulfill work or financial obligations."