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>Generally it's not unhealthy to cry during emotionally turbulent episodes in your life; it's (crying) a method by which you're controlling your stress This is

>Generally it's not unhealthy to cry during emotionally turbulent episodes in your life; it's (crying) a method by which you're controlling your stress This is modern pseudoscientific nonsense, born in part of institutional crises in academia. >Those i've met that don't cry tend to have longer periods between emotional 'episodes', but tend to act out much more aggressively. This is blatant projection of personal bias. Some people, men in particular, deal with emotions stoically. It's a perfectly valid approach, eastern philosophy has been teaching meditation to a similar end for thousands of years, not to mention this particular gender norm existed until very recent time, while we built civilization. I challenge you to cite a reproducible, unbiased study that rigorously demonstrates the necessity of crying for all, or at least a sizable majority of, people. The trouble is you're dealing with the softest of sciences, one which is particularly vulnerable to bias from institutional dogma.

tunesmith 7y ago
I don't think you need studies. Look at who crying hurts, and who crying helps. Crying alone is fairly costless, what are you wasting, time? What's the harm? But it's easy to find anecdata of how crying helps - stress relief, greater self-compassion, and the realizations that come afterwards.
TaylorAlexander 7y ago
I think it is true that it is not unhealthy to cry. Perhaps some people do not need to cry, but I don't think avoiding crying is an indication of more executive control. I cry all the time, because I'm not trying to avoid it. It feels good to cry for me.
- yibg 7y ago
  I do try not to cry in front of other people and for the most part succeed. When alone though some times I do cry (eg watching a sad movie), because the effort to hold it in doesn’t seem to be worth it. But the thing is I don’t feel better having cried. Often times I actually feel worse, like a positive feedback loop. The crying makes me feel worse so I cry more which makes me feel worse still and so on.
ribosometronome 7y ago
Males also die five years younger, on average. A large portion of the gap has roots in poor mental health (risk-taking behavior, alcohol/diet, and suicide).
- sadfklsjlkjwt 7y ago
  Rather than blaming men for not living longer consider how much less is spent on treating and researching male health issues than female. For example in the UK boys were offered the HPV vaccine 10 years after girls. Yet during that period male death rates from HPV related throat cancer were comparable to female death rates from HPV related cervical cancer.
  - dan-robertson 7y ago
    I don’t really buy this claim. I think there are also examples of this the other way round (eg endometriosis affects many women but little research was done into it for a long time and people were turned away being told they were just imagining their pain instead of being given a diagnosis). I don’t think I’m in a good position to guess at which sex is treated worse by medical research but I don’t think it’s obviously men.
    - ericmay 7y ago
      I’m not sure medical research treats one gender better than the other - not something I have a strong opinion about. But if the person you’re responding to is truthful, it’s odd that if the rates were similar why we only hear about one of the two groups being affected, isn’t it? I think if you search you can find a lot of these across both sexes, actually. I’m not sure what the cause of throat HPV is, but if it’s oral sex on women maybe that reveals a societies taboo. It’s so taboo that we are willing to let people die rather than admit it. Anyway just a few thoughts as I was skimming the posts here.
      - sadfklsjlkjwt 7y ago
        As far a public health is concerned it's settled fact and has been for some years. The main risk seems to be for men that have sex with men rather than oral sex with women. Men that have sex with men can now (finally) get the vaccine on the NHS up to the age of 35.

tunesmith 7y ago

I don't think you need studies. Look at who crying hurts, and who crying helps. Crying alone is fairly costless, what are you wasting, time? What's the harm? But it's easy to find anecdata of how crying helps - stress relief, greater self-compassion, and the realizations that come afterwards.

TaylorAlexander 7y ago

I think it is true that it is not unhealthy to cry. Perhaps some people do not need to cry, but I don't think avoiding crying is an indication of more executive control. I cry all the time, because I'm not trying to avoid it. It feels good to cry for me.

yibg 7y ago
I do try not to cry in front of other people and for the most part succeed. When alone though some times I do cry (eg watching a sad movie), because the effort to hold it in doesn’t seem to be worth it. But the thing is I don’t feel better having cried. Often times I actually feel worse, like a positive feedback loop. The crying makes me feel worse so I cry more which makes me feel worse still and so on.

ribosometronome 7y ago

Males also die five years younger, on average. A large portion of the gap has roots in poor mental health (risk-taking behavior, alcohol/diet, and suicide).

sadfklsjlkjwt 7y ago
Rather than blaming men for not living longer consider how much less is spent on treating and researching male health issues than female. For example in the UK boys were offered the HPV vaccine 10 years after girls. Yet during that period male death rates from HPV related throat cancer were comparable to female death rates from HPV related cervical cancer.
- dan-robertson 7y ago
  I don’t really buy this claim. I think there are also examples of this the other way round (eg endometriosis affects many women but little research was done into it for a long time and people were turned away being told they were just imagining their pain instead of being given a diagnosis). I don’t think I’m in a good position to guess at which sex is treated worse by medical research but I don’t think it’s obviously men.
  - ericmay 7y ago
    I’m not sure medical research treats one gender better than the other - not something I have a strong opinion about. But if the person you’re responding to is truthful, it’s odd that if the rates were similar why we only hear about one of the two groups being affected, isn’t it? I think if you search you can find a lot of these across both sexes, actually. I’m not sure what the cause of throat HPV is, but if it’s oral sex on women maybe that reveals a societies taboo. It’s so taboo that we are willing to let people die rather than admit it. Anyway just a few thoughts as I was skimming the posts here.
    - sadfklsjlkjwt 7y ago
      As far a public health is concerned it's settled fact and has been for some years. The main risk seems to be for men that have sex with men rather than oral sex with women. Men that have sex with men can now (finally) get the vaccine on the NHS up to the age of 35.