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Are you being good to them? Are you doing it for them? The person you are replying to seems to be crying AT his children. "watch me cry!" "see how I feel!" "lo

Are you being good to them? Are you doing it for them? The person you are replying to seems to be crying AT his children. "watch me cry!" "see how I feel!" "look wife, I'm a good man now!". To me, this seems to be self-indulgence. For example he is boasting "My oldest is developing wonderful empathy." Read: I am imposing the whims of a group I see myself as been good for associating with onto my child. This is not what a father is for. I've seen my father cry a few times. The most recent was when my cousin commited suicide. He meant it. It was not an exhibtion of his goodness, but the acknowledgment of her goodness.

zrail 7y ago
What would you say a parent's job is?
- signalremotefac 7y ago
  Wait...I should be mindful that I come from an unconventional background and...I am also English. Those people known for a lack of emotion. Maybe I am not the best person to answer this question.
Waterluvian 7y ago
You couldn't have understood or interpreted what I was saying more wrongly. To keep it simple: 1. for example, it was Christmas. I usually have a cry at some point when I think about the amazing Christmases my mother put on. Kids are in the room and I don't try to hide it. The oldest takes notice, worries about me. I engage him rather than trying to hide it. 2. I'm proud of my kids. If you've got kids you'll understand it takes effort _not_ to brag about their accomplishments all the time. 3. While not my intent, there's nothing wrong with boasting, and a bit of self-indulgence. Though I certainly didn't feel any. 4. What I want, above all else, is to share with other parents the lessons I'm discovering to be important. I cherish when parents share theirs with me. Parenting is fucking difficult.
- signalremotefac 7y ago
  I suppose this is a small example of a larger problem. We are communicating through mediums with limited context, constricted conversations. Compelled to keep it simple, when what we are diccusing is anything but, simple. I mean, I can't even see your face. Crying or otherwise.

zrail 7y ago

What would you say a parent's job is?

signalremotefac 7y ago
Wait...I should be mindful that I come from an unconventional background and...I am also English. Those people known for a lack of emotion. Maybe I am not the best person to answer this question.

Waterluvian 7y ago

You couldn't have understood or interpreted what I was saying more wrongly. To keep it simple: 1. for example, it was Christmas. I usually have a cry at some point when I think about the amazing Christmases my mother put on. Kids are in the room and I don't try to hide it. The oldest takes notice, worries about me. I engage him rather than trying to hide it. 2. I'm proud of my kids. If you've got kids you'll understand it takes effort _not_ to brag about their accomplishments all the time. 3. While not my intent, there's nothing wrong with boasting, and a bit of self-indulgence. Though I certainly didn't feel any. 4. What I want, above all else, is to share with other parents the lessons I'm discovering to be important. I cherish when parents share theirs with me. Parenting is fucking difficult.

signalremotefac 7y ago
I suppose this is a small example of a larger problem. We are communicating through mediums with limited context, constricted conversations. Compelled to keep it simple, when what we are diccusing is anything but, simple. I mean, I can't even see your face. Crying or otherwise.