5 ms·
Very good post, lots of good points. One thing I remember reading that really stuck with me - most people externalize failure and internalize success. Meaning,
by lionhearted 16y ago
Very good post, lots of good points.
One thing I remember reading that really stuck with me - most people externalize failure and internalize success. Meaning, when things go wrong, they point to external factors. When things go right, they credit their own skill and ability.
The opposite way is to externalize success and internalize failure - that means claiming responsibility for it whenever you don't get desired results, but being very skeptical of your successes and looking for where external factors broke your way so you don't get too high on yourself.
Turns out, externalizing failure/internalizing success makes you much happier but much less able to produce results.
Whereas internalizing failure/externalizing success makes you much less happy but much more able to deliver results.
Now note, this only applies in cases where your incentives come from producing results, as opposed to convincing other people you did well. That's the trouble with middle management and with politics - you win by convincing people you're doing a good job, more than actually doing a good job. That's very conducive to blaming external conditions for everything going wrong, and claiming personal success for everything that went right... which is much less conducive to results.
Nasty, huh? Actually that's why self-employment/entrepreneurship is so cool - we get paid for results, not for convincing anyone we're doing well in spite of the results. Thus, while it's still hard to claim every failure as your own and be skeptical of the successes, we do get compensated better for it.
- Swizec 16y agoOne question pops up from your post: What happens when you internalize both success and failure?
- knieveltech 16y agoImplosion, followed by a singularity.
- winestock 16y agoEducated guess: mood swings. When you succeed, you're on top of the world and can do no wrong. When you fail, you're a loser who can do nothing right.
- AlexandrB 16y agoEven when you fail one could argue that it's not all bad - at least you would feel in control of your life. What about when both success and failure are externalized? I think that kind of helplessness would be a much worse feeling.
- winestock 16y agoPerhaps those suffering from paranoia externalize both success and failure. Failure is proof that They are out to get you. Success is proof that They are setting you up for a fall.
- invalidOrTaken 16y agoWhich sounds like an exact description of the emotional life of a founder.
- winestock 16y agoI see that you've posted about starting your venture: http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1519002 http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1519002 So you're speaking from experience. Have an upvote. I've started my own business, too. I commiserate.
- lsc 16y agoThere is a big difference between saying: "Wow, I really screwed the pooch there. It's going to take a while for me to live this one down. I better get to work." and "Wow, I really screwed the pooch there. I'm worthless and I can't do anything right. I should go drink." One of those, I think, is a healthy way of accepting responsibility for failure. The other is not. The same, really, goes on the upside.
- winestock 16y agoTrue. I was making a shoot-from-the-hip guess. The difference between the two approaches which you mentioned is a correct sense of proportion. Of course, the same applies to the other ways in which one internalizes/externalizes both success and failure.
- JoeAltmaier 16y agoActually, I like your post better. Its a quick summary. The original was more of an essay, dense and long-winded, ending with "I guess you can't explain it". You just did explain it.
- psykotic 16y ago> One thing I remember reading that really stuck with me - most people externalize failure and internalize success. I'm not sure of your definition of "most people" but how do you square this with the impostor syndrome that is reported to be widespread among highly skilled people? It's the exact opposite of what you claim as the default psychology.