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There's so much middle-class context assumed in this piece I don't know where to begin. What if, for starters, you have a family and the responsibilities that c

by cutler 7y ago

There's so much middle-class context assumed in this piece I don't know where to begin. What if, for starters, you have a family and the responsibilities that come with it? "I'm only going to focus on my passion from now on" will probably lead to homelessness in pretty quick time unless you have a nest-egg to burn through while you reach profitability. What if you're in your 50s and stuck in a low paid job with a wife to take care of? What if you have a disability? The point I'm making is that a lot of life's time-sinks/distractions are non-negotiable and one life varies drastically from another in terms of how much freedom one has to pursue one's passion. Those who shout loudest that money doesn't matter are usually the ones who have plenty. In the author's middle-class world there are always other options to what you're doing at any point in time. Unfortunately this isn't a universal given. A lot of people are stuck with massive amounts of debt just trying to survive and live from one paycheck to the next. In this context pursuing one's passion is sadly not an option if you want to be able to keep up your rent payments.

nine_k 7y ago
Pursuing one's passion can indeed lead you to ruin, and did so to many people. But concentrating on something you're good at, and not spreading yourself too thin, is a pretty solid advice, middle class or not. It is by doing 100 things and not becoming good at any of them you end up in poor state without viable options.
proverbialbunny 7y ago
It may be better to say the ability to concentrate is of benefit. If you have a higher level of focus, you'll take a step back when someone says or does something harmful, and be able to communicate effectively in a mature and kind way. This can improve your relationship. The benefits are not just work. If you have concentration, you can setup a 1 hour block a day first thing in the morning, and work on a goal every day, instead of futzing around. You can go to bed on time easier too, because mental habits are more malleable with focus and awareness. I can keep going on. The benefits seep into your every day life, regardless if you're on the street or a billionaire. This is why mindfulness meditation has become so popular, and in late why lsd was so popular, because both increase focus and concentration, as well as increase awareness into what is important so you can better achieve your goals even if it is only working towards it 5 minutes a day. It's no secret you need a minimum amount of focus to succeed in life. Sure, it's only an ingredient, not the whole dish, but it, like oil, is an important base ingredient.
AndrewKemendo 7y ago
I think maybe a good way to describe it is a hierarchy of priorities. The examples you give, taking care of a wife, family responsibilities etc... are in your words "non-negotiable." Which I interpret as required to be maintained as top priority irrespective of all other wants, needs and desires. Each of those examples however, except for having a disability, is truly a choice in terms of priority. I think most people would argue that it is unconscionable to abandon a family or ailing spouse to "follow their dreams," however it's surprisingly common to see. That's not to defend it, but simply to point out that it is done and with surprising frequency, by people who you probably admire. Someone quoted Bukowski on here recently, as giving some insight into the mind of someone who is fully invested in something, and I think it's apropos for this discussion: "If you're going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don't even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench...etc [1]" It sounds like your suggesting that people are actively making that "all-in investment" in what you describe as non-negotiables. [1] https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/13275.Charles_Bukowski https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/13275.Charles_Bukows...
- cutler 7y ago
  Whatever happened to living a balanced life and the satisfaction of fulfilling a responsibility? It may not be fashionable but some view the follow-your-passion cult as shallow and self-centered.
  - AndrewKemendo 7y ago
    Maybe I didn't make my point clear. The concept here is that, everyone has something that they prioritize - even if not explicitly. So writing something like "Whatever happened to living a balanced life and the satisfaction of fulfilling a responsibility?" suggests that the primary priority you think is being under-emphasized is "living a balanced life." This is very similar to the popular philosophy of "diversity of experience" being the ultimate priority, which is a remixed version of the classical philosophy of hedonism [1] (not to be confused with the modern interpretation which only focuses on sexual pleasure). [1]https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/hedonism/ https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/hedonism/
gremlinsinc 7y ago
Middle class doesn't always mean well off. I'd consider myself middle-class but have zero savings and rent because my income is never certain (freelancer). I also get bored with client work so when I do get a nest egg or bills together I work on side projects hoping one gets me to ramen profitability (ideally a little more than ramen 2-3k/month mrr would be nice). I've got a family now (2 kids under 3), been married 14 years just kids weren't easy to get (lots of ivf and shit jobs for the free ivf), I was struggling over summer with no clients, and now my clients are not great pay wise (35/hour vs 60/hr what I'd like to make vs 100/hr what a lot of freelance devs claim they earn), so I've been putting in 60+ hours per week to catch up on bills and had to borrow 8k from family to make monthly bills over the summer. I live in rural Utah near wife's family and her mom is really sick so moving isn't an option so freelance or remote is my only option. I'm tempted to try and get a remote job with benefits cause it would be a lot easier just to be on salary again but I hate interviewing. I feel exhausted by this cycle of ups and downs financially. Thought I'd own a home by now. I guess things are better than ten years ago though. I weighed 260 lbs more than I do now. I wasn't a developer (seo marketer), I earned under 10/hr. Learned to develop in 2012/2013 started hr Dev work in 2013, changed my life. I'm on the right trajectory just feel lost from time to time with what I should be doing to move up and not down.
kervansaray 7y ago
> What if you're in your 50s and stuck in a low paid job with a wife to take care of? What if you have a disability? > Unfortunately this isn't a universal given. A lot of people are stuck with massive amounts of debt just trying to survive and live from one paycheck to the next Where would one find statistics or some numbers regarding the above?
- cutler 7y ago
  The Guardian (UK) has produced some pretty impressive research over the years but you'd have to search their archives.

by cutler 7y ago

nine_k 7y ago

Pursuing one's passion can indeed lead you to ruin, and did so to many people. But concentrating on something you're good at, and not spreading yourself too thin, is a pretty solid advice, middle class or not. It is by doing 100 things and not becoming good at any of them you end up in poor state without viable options.

proverbialbunny 7y ago

It may be better to say the ability to concentrate is of benefit. If you have a higher level of focus, you'll take a step back when someone says or does something harmful, and be able to communicate effectively in a mature and kind way. This can improve your relationship. The benefits are not just work. If you have concentration, you can setup a 1 hour block a day first thing in the morning, and work on a goal every day, instead of futzing around. You can go to bed on time easier too, because mental habits are more malleable with focus and awareness. I can keep going on. The benefits seep into your every day life, regardless if you're on the street or a billionaire. This is why mindfulness meditation has become so popular, and in late why lsd was so popular, because both increase focus and concentration, as well as increase awareness into what is important so you can better achieve your goals even if it is only working towards it 5 minutes a day. It's no secret you need a minimum amount of focus to succeed in life. Sure, it's only an ingredient, not the whole dish, but it, like oil, is an important base ingredient.

AndrewKemendo 7y ago

I think maybe a good way to describe it is a hierarchy of priorities. The examples you give, taking care of a wife, family responsibilities etc... are in your words "non-negotiable." Which I interpret as required to be maintained as top priority irrespective of all other wants, needs and desires. Each of those examples however, except for having a disability, is truly a choice in terms of priority. I think most people would argue that it is unconscionable to abandon a family or ailing spouse to "follow their dreams," however it's surprisingly common to see. That's not to defend it, but simply to point out that it is done and with surprising frequency, by people who you probably admire. Someone quoted Bukowski on here recently, as giving some insight into the mind of someone who is fully invested in something, and I think it's apropos for this discussion: "If you're going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don't even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench...etc [1]" It sounds like your suggesting that people are actively making that "all-in investment" in what you describe as non-negotiables. [1] https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/13275.Charles_Bukowski https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/13275.Charles_Bukows...

cutler 7y ago
Whatever happened to living a balanced life and the satisfaction of fulfilling a responsibility? It may not be fashionable but some view the follow-your-passion cult as shallow and self-centered.
- AndrewKemendo 7y ago
  Maybe I didn't make my point clear. The concept here is that, everyone has something that they prioritize - even if not explicitly. So writing something like "Whatever happened to living a balanced life and the satisfaction of fulfilling a responsibility?" suggests that the primary priority you think is being under-emphasized is "living a balanced life." This is very similar to the popular philosophy of "diversity of experience" being the ultimate priority, which is a remixed version of the classical philosophy of hedonism [1] (not to be confused with the modern interpretation which only focuses on sexual pleasure). [1]https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/hedonism/ https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/hedonism/

gremlinsinc 7y ago

Middle class doesn't always mean well off. I'd consider myself middle-class but have zero savings and rent because my income is never certain (freelancer). I also get bored with client work so when I do get a nest egg or bills together I work on side projects hoping one gets me to ramen profitability (ideally a little more than ramen 2-3k/month mrr would be nice). I've got a family now (2 kids under 3), been married 14 years just kids weren't easy to get (lots of ivf and shit jobs for the free ivf), I was struggling over summer with no clients, and now my clients are not great pay wise (35/hour vs 60/hr what I'd like to make vs 100/hr what a lot of freelance devs claim they earn), so I've been putting in 60+ hours per week to catch up on bills and had to borrow 8k from family to make monthly bills over the summer. I live in rural Utah near wife's family and her mom is really sick so moving isn't an option so freelance or remote is my only option. I'm tempted to try and get a remote job with benefits cause it would be a lot easier just to be on salary again but I hate interviewing. I feel exhausted by this cycle of ups and downs financially. Thought I'd own a home by now. I guess things are better than ten years ago though. I weighed 260 lbs more than I do now. I wasn't a developer (seo marketer), I earned under 10/hr. Learned to develop in 2012/2013 started hr Dev work in 2013, changed my life. I'm on the right trajectory just feel lost from time to time with what I should be doing to move up and not down.

kervansaray 7y ago

> What if you're in your 50s and stuck in a low paid job with a wife to take care of? What if you have a disability? > Unfortunately this isn't a universal given. A lot of people are stuck with massive amounts of debt just trying to survive and live from one paycheck to the next Where would one find statistics or some numbers regarding the above?

cutler 7y ago
The Guardian (UK) has produced some pretty impressive research over the years but you'd have to search their archives.