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The Type of Employee You Really Want: Porn Star
- rbxbx 16y agoEverything about this thread is awful. Please flag.
- johngalt 16y agoExcellent satire. I think most startups would be better off managing a small team of specialists rather than trying to get the rockstar. There are exceeding few people that truely have end-to-end knowledge, and as systems become more abstract that number will only shrink. So don't look for a guy that "makes the computer do X" where X = infinity. Just map out what the different major areas are and how they interact.
- ehsanul 16y agoWell, this really depends on the startup and what stage they're at. At the early stages, where it's just the founders, it's probably for the best if the founders are generalists and can handle almost anything. Once someone lands the funding/revenues to actually hire, then of course it makes more sense to get specialists at some point. But even then, making your first couple employees generalists doesn't sound like a bad idea to me at all. Of course, this is all speculation: I've never hired anyone, hence everyone should ignore whatever I say here. But it's definitely easier to work with people who can pick up new stuff quickly, and a generalist is usually that type of person in my experience.
- endtime 16y agoI don't think a rockstar is someone who already knows everything so much as someone who can learn to do whatever is needed at any given moment. And honestly, that is the kind of person you need at a startup.
- deleted 16y ago[deleted]
- TheAmazingIdiot 16y agoI guess it really IS "Put Out or Get Out".
- DanielRibeiro 16y agoNow this is a romantic description of startups. Wait! Romance has nothing to do with this description...
- jorgem 16y ago"pizza guy", "all girls catholic school", "server repair man"... sounds pretty male-centric... you sure a woman couldn't do the job?
- dgabriel 16y agoI would definitely not apply for a programming job that included "porn star," anywhere in the description. I could do the job, but I'm sure as hell not going to.
- intellectronica 16y agoAlmost as funny as "if airlines were operating systems".
- jarin 16y agoThe funny thing is porn stars DO get paid very well ($2000-3000 for an hour or so of work). Well, the female ones anyway. The male porn stars get something like $600.
- klbarry 16y agoI am 80% sure that data is false, from my memory of porn industry Ask Tells on something awful and AMAs on Reddit. Males get paid very little.
- jarin 16y agoMy data is based on my memory of working at a porn company. Maybe we overpaid.
- klbarry 16y agoAh, then you know more than me, ignore my interruption.
- dkarl 16y agoI'm sure it varies very widely depending on whether the male is a name star, an experienced professional, or just some guy who is psyched about the opportunity.
- jarin 16y agoI'm not sure how current the quoted figures on Wikipedia are, but if they're accurate it looks like the agencies we used add a little bit of a premium to the rates (most of our guys and girls came from adult talent agencies). I can definitely see how non-agency guys wouldn't be able to command as much though. I guess a lot of them have to start off "gay for pay" just to break into the industry.
- swombat 16y agoApparently those rates have plummeted due to the wide availability of free amateur porn online. Edit: Interestingly, whereas open-source code expands the market (and rates) for programmers, open porn destroys the market for porn stars...
- jrockway 16y agoThe Type of Blog Post I Really Want: One With Some Substance
- gnufied 16y agoHave an upvote sir. I really don't understand, what an article like this is doing on the front page of hacker news.
- coderdude 16y agoPerhaps 160+ people don't agree with what the rest of us believe is quality reading material. That's a hell of a force to fight. That, or the "blind-vote" bait of the title was too much to resist.
- redthrowaway 16y agoI think you've hit the nail on the head. Even HN isn't immune to linkbait.
- deleted 16y ago[deleted]
- moomba 16y agoI guess the bit of substance this article does have is that these names we like to give elite hackers that work at startups are silly. Maybe it doesn't take a short article to make that point, but that is basically what I got out of it.
- sausagefeet 16y agoThe author had lots of stanima though.
- cachemoney 16y agoIt's relevant and IMO funny satire. Everything can't be an in-depth Erlang tutorial.
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- millerc 16y agoAfter 30 years, no wonder I feel dirty.
- kgtm 16y agoI can't put my finger on what exactly turned me on about such a job listing, but it did (no pun intended). Any places for amateur fetishist porn stars (Perl)?
- autalpha 16y agoI like humour and satire; but somehow, this one just didn't do it for me. In the back of my mind, it feels a bit sexist and degrading. Perhaps it's the stigma the porn industry had created. As a developer, I feel conflicted :/
- shadowspar 16y agoClearly, folks who complain about the locker-room mentality of the tech industry don't have a leg to stand on. >_< What next, a blog post about fart jokes?
- deleted 16y ago[deleted]
- krakensden 16y agoOn the plus side, HR departments will never, ever jump on this bandwagon.
- kemayo 16y ago"will be compensated with tons of really enjoyable work" From all I've heard, porn-sex is not terribly enjoyable.
- sixtofour 16y agoAll he did was describe a rock star ninja, and call it a porn star. Or did I just hear a "whoosh" go by my head?
- blahblahblah 16y agoThis metaphor needs to die, stat (and hopefully take the ninja and rock star metaphors with it into the dustbin of history). It adds nothing useful to the discourse about programming and, worse, is demeaning to the profession.
- ippisl 16y agoWhich profession?
- blahblahblah 16y agoThe one that requires high-level cognitive functions. Any idiot with a prescription for Viagra or Cialis can do the other one.
- iamleppert 16y agoYou know, I hope they end up with some starry-eyed dumbass who doesn't know his own hole. Maybe someone who just watched the social network and picked up a book on facebook markup language? What about the product? I'm a pretty talented guy and can get jobs easily. What is going to make me quit my well paying job at a _successful_ startup and jump on your bandwagon? The romantic notion of risking everything and working at a coffee shop? I'm sorry, but whoever else said the "ninja" and "rock star" metaphor needs to die said it best. Please, please get rid of these things and replace them with some substance!
- ErrantX 16y agoThis describes an excellent employee (for some, anyway). But it doesn't describe a porn star.
- Steve_Baker 16y agoObviously not for me. I finish all my programs in under 5 minutes. :-(
- cpeterso 16y agoStartups are always looking for coding rock stars and ninjas. Where are coding pirates and zombies supposed to work? :)
- sukuriant 16y agoThe Bay