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I think the issue is that here in Germany there is a lot of unspoken peer pressure in regards to where you should be in life at your age. That pressure makes it

by kfk 7y ago

I think the issue is that here in Germany there is a lot of unspoken peer pressure in regards to where you should be in life at your age. That pressure makes it hard to keep things in a flow and basically people (German and expats) tend to put a structure around everything. Social interactions? Needs to happen at the appropriate time and scheduled at least 2 weeks in advance. Fancy restaurant dinner with girlfriend? Needs to be scheduled weeks before. Work life balance? You must have work life balance and you must go out on sunny days, which is great until it feels again like pressure to be something you don't want to be. Hiking? You will find another zillion people on that mountain because again you are supposed to go out on sunny days. It can feel very "robotic" and I think people just end up detaching themselves from what they truly want or truly need from their social interactions.

fit2rule 7y ago
As an Aussie who's lived around the world with stints in California and Germany, I really miss my American friends' ability to just show up when they figured I'd be around, unannounced, and hang out for an afternoon - or not, no worries, nobody home - compared to my German friends who literally needed a weeks notice to come over and have a couple of beers, even in this mobile-phone era. Or, my Australian pals who would come over, let themselves in, do the dishes, have a beer, and wait until I got home. Then again, there are the Austrians. Never, ever be even a minute late to an event involving Austrian friends. Strange how things are more and more rigid, the further from the frontier one gets ..
mtberatwork 7y ago
> You must have work life balance and you must go out on sunny days, which is great until it feels again like pressure to be something you don't want to be. Hiking? You will find another zillion people on that mountain because again you are supposed to go out on sunny days. Eh, that's mostly because wandern/hiking is basically a national past time. There is no pressure though. You'll find lots of people doing other things outside too. The only pressure is to be respectful of "Ruhetag" (often Sundays) and avoid work, especially loud work outside. In the US, this isn't respected and can be quite jarring.

by kfk 7y ago

fit2rule 7y ago

As an Aussie who's lived around the world with stints in California and Germany, I really miss my American friends' ability to just show up when they figured I'd be around, unannounced, and hang out for an afternoon - or not, no worries, nobody home - compared to my German friends who literally needed a weeks notice to come over and have a couple of beers, even in this mobile-phone era. Or, my Australian pals who would come over, let themselves in, do the dishes, have a beer, and wait until I got home. Then again, there are the Austrians. Never, ever be even a minute late to an event involving Austrian friends. Strange how things are more and more rigid, the further from the frontier one gets ..

mtberatwork 7y ago

> You must have work life balance and you must go out on sunny days, which is great until it feels again like pressure to be something you don't want to be. Hiking? You will find another zillion people on that mountain because again you are supposed to go out on sunny days. Eh, that's mostly because wandern/hiking is basically a national past time. There is no pressure though. You'll find lots of people doing other things outside too. The only pressure is to be respectful of "Ruhetag" (often Sundays) and avoid work, especially loud work outside. In the US, this isn't respected and can be quite jarring.