To add to the (dystopian?) scenario I painted at the bottom of my post, the VR sextelligence might make full eye contact and modulate their behavior to optimize

To add to the (dystopian?) scenario I painted at the bottom of my post, the VR sextelligence might make full eye contact and modulate their behavior to optimize for sexual excitation, as measured by the degree to which your eyes are dilated. That is completely plausible and is simply an extension of extant technology.