4 ms·

I've tried a lot of meetups ranging from things like board games to hiking to organized sports, and while they're nice ways to find activities, in my experience

I've tried a lot of meetups ranging from things like board games to hiking to organized sports, and while they're nice ways to find activities, in my experience most people show up in groups and it is vanishingly rare to see the same people more than a few times. Volunteering and local community events seem more promising, but they have the same general issue: at least in the past few years that I've been attending them in search of community, you rarely see the same people more than once or twice. Thanks for taking the time to offer advice, though.

_Understated_ 7y ago
Then start your own meetup for people that just want to chat :) No agenda, just chatting to each other. I bet you'll be fighting them off... the thought that you would be oversubscribed is both great and slightly depressing at the same time. Ask at a local bar on a Tuesday night (or any other quiet night) if they can keep a section aside for you. They will jump at the chance of a few more patrons. Make it cheap, perhaps £1. Something that shows commitment but won't put people off. Make it a donation of £1 to your local Samaritans instead. I'll get off my soapbox now but this idea just jumped into my head :)
- TurkishPoptart 7y ago
  I like this idea.
twodave 7y ago
I'll pitch mine in--if you're actually completely un-attached, move! Find a city known for being a more inviting place. Move there. Attend church. Get a remote job, spend your time out in public. Become a regular at some places (coffee shop, gym, etc.). Make friends with the people who work there. In general, invest in people by doing genuinely nice things for them. Serve others, and be honest about how you feel when it's appropriate. I have a wife and 4 kids and I get lonely surprisingly often. Having lots of ways to combat the low feelings is important. I just happen to live in a pretty friendly place (Jacksonville, FL), which also helps. Wish ya the best!
TurkishPoptart 7y ago
If you're in the PNW, I'd hang out with you.
- leggomylibro 7y ago
  Thank you! Unfortunately I'm not, though - I gave up on the PNW in despair a few months ago, and I'm just wandering now. At least the backcountry of the US is a pretty place to wait for death.

_Understated_ 7y ago

Then start your own meetup for people that just want to chat :) No agenda, just chatting to each other. I bet you'll be fighting them off... the thought that you would be oversubscribed is both great and slightly depressing at the same time. Ask at a local bar on a Tuesday night (or any other quiet night) if they can keep a section aside for you. They will jump at the chance of a few more patrons. Make it cheap, perhaps £1. Something that shows commitment but won't put people off. Make it a donation of £1 to your local Samaritans instead. I'll get off my soapbox now but this idea just jumped into my head :)

TurkishPoptart 7y ago
I like this idea.

twodave 7y ago

I'll pitch mine in--if you're actually completely un-attached, move! Find a city known for being a more inviting place. Move there. Attend church. Get a remote job, spend your time out in public. Become a regular at some places (coffee shop, gym, etc.). Make friends with the people who work there. In general, invest in people by doing genuinely nice things for them. Serve others, and be honest about how you feel when it's appropriate. I have a wife and 4 kids and I get lonely surprisingly often. Having lots of ways to combat the low feelings is important. I just happen to live in a pretty friendly place (Jacksonville, FL), which also helps. Wish ya the best!

TurkishPoptart 7y ago

If you're in the PNW, I'd hang out with you.

leggomylibro 7y ago
Thank you! Unfortunately I'm not, though - I gave up on the PNW in despair a few months ago, and I'm just wandering now. At least the backcountry of the US is a pretty place to wait for death.