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Several things you just said are dramatically oversimplified.
by _bxg1 7y ago
Several things you just said are dramatically oversimplified.
- mcv 7y agoThat's unavoidable when you tackle such a complex topic in two lines. But he's right that confidence is attractive. Of course that can be dangerous too; it's what con-men rely on. So it's a balance. But too much lack of confidence is a problem too.
- _bxg1 7y agoYou can have infinite confidence and still be kind/sensitive/considerate. The two are independent axes, and both are important (and attractive).
- username90 7y ago> You can have infinite confidence and still be kind/sensitive/considerate. How is this possible? Infinite confidence would mean that you think it is impossible that you aren't right and therefore others must be wrong when they disagree or reject you. I can't see such a person being kind, sensitive or considerate.
- _bxg1 7y agoConfidence means you aren't pushed around by the world; sensitivity means you willingly open yourself up and pay attention to the world around you, and take it into consideration. The difference is nuanced, but very important. In some ways confidence empowers a person to be kinder and more considerate. Not that they will be automatically, but they have more opportunity to be. Someone who lacks true confidence is naturally on the defensive, always having to think about how to prop up their own standing. More often than not, people who come off as brash and pushy are actually doing so out of a deep insecurity that they're trying to satisfy.
- mcv 7y agoThere's a difference between the confidence that you're absolutely, undeniably correct and it's inconceivable that you might be wrong, and the confidence that you deserve to be present and involved, and that your views are valid and defensible, and that you're willing to reconsider those views when faced with a sufficiently convincing argument that it's wrong.