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"I'd hesitate to advise someone to be debriefed by a professional. For all their training, empathy, my thoughts & feelings are my own. Not to be dissected, diag

by LPTS 18y ago

"I'd hesitate to advise someone to be debriefed by a professional. For all their training, empathy, my thoughts & feelings are my own. Not to be dissected, diagnosed and cataloged." That's an archaic attitude towards psychology. A trained psychological professional, will, for example, differentiate between their own experiences and those of their client, while the people on here will tell their own stories as if their stories have relevance on how this guy should proceed. (That can be healthy, too, but it's not a substitute for a primary relationship with a person trained at recognizing the places transference operates). What you shouldn't do is take any advice on here. That would be like getting programming advice from a psychologist. I've done a couple years of work with people on hospice, and have done a little with suicide prevention stuff. So I'm aware that these professionals should be respected and used, and I'm also aware how pathetically easy it is to get duped by transference during these situations involving grief. Get real help.

bootload 18y ago
"... That's an archaic attitude towards psychology ... Get real help ..." Archaic but effective. I imagine my repressed Anglo-Celtic ancestry where death & grieving was followed with a "wet-wake" ~ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wake_ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wake_(ceremony) I imagine served them well. Tragic as it is death is also a part of life. While groups of like kin may be devoid of the latest medical advancements they do have advantage of common sense. There is quite a magnitude of difference b/w grief and mental illness quite visible to people you know well. "... What you shouldn't do is take any advice on here. That would be like getting programming advice from a psychologist. I've done a couple years of work with people on hospice, and have done a little with suicide prevention stuff ..." By your own admission I wouldn't take yours either. But I do see your point.
- LPTS 18y ago
  You are presenting a false dichotomy. A professional is not going to stop you from grieving in whatever modality feels right to you, while helping you identify emotions, process them, and dealing with what unique challenges come up. You can have both. Get the professional help.

by LPTS 18y ago

bootload 18y ago

"... That's an archaic attitude towards psychology ... Get real help ..." Archaic but effective. I imagine my repressed Anglo-Celtic ancestry where death & grieving was followed with a "wet-wake" ~ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wake_ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wake_(ceremony) I imagine served them well. Tragic as it is death is also a part of life. While groups of like kin may be devoid of the latest medical advancements they do have advantage of common sense. There is quite a magnitude of difference b/w grief and mental illness quite visible to people you know well. "... What you shouldn't do is take any advice on here. That would be like getting programming advice from a psychologist. I've done a couple years of work with people on hospice, and have done a little with suicide prevention stuff ..." By your own admission I wouldn't take yours either. But I do see your point.

LPTS 18y ago
You are presenting a false dichotomy. A professional is not going to stop you from grieving in whatever modality feels right to you, while helping you identify emotions, process them, and dealing with what unique challenges come up. You can have both. Get the professional help.