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On the few occasions I've heard someone use the term "emotional labor" in real life (and not on Twitter), I've asked them to specify what it means, and every pe
by xenihn 7y ago
On the few occasions I've heard someone use the term "emotional labor" in real life (and not on Twitter), I've asked them to specify what it means, and every person gave a different answer. It did pretty much boil down to "doing chores and mailing holiday cards", though.
I had never seen the original definition before, and that's exactly what I thought it meant when I first saw the term, and it's also what I thought it should have meant after I repeatedly saw it used in ways that I now know were erroneous.
- taneq 7y agoThe discussions I've had around it have generally involved people defining it as "managing and planning chores even if someone else is doing them," with the canonical example being the stay-at-home wife who manages the household and the husband who "helps" by asking her to micromanage him rather than just taking the initiative. By the article above, this definitely sounds like mental labour (although still tiring) rather than emotional.
- klodolph 7y agoThe example I think of is choosing a meal for a household—anticipating every household member’s reaction to the meal and accepting the consequences if people don’t like it. Basically, managing people’s emotions.
- taneq 7y agoThat sounds like a more reasonable example that matches the original definition. I'll use this one next time it comes up amongst my friends.