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I can relate a little about my experiences doing zen-style meditation over the last few years. After long periods of meditation, like a weekend retreat or even

I can relate a little about my experiences doing zen-style meditation over the last few years. After long periods of meditation, like a weekend retreat or even a day of sitting, I tend to be very focused and relaxed. My normally chaotic emotions are subdued and I have a profound feeling of well-being and peace. This generally lasts for several days to several weeks depending on the lengths of sitting. Sitting daily sometimes has this effect as well, it is more intermittent for me. On the other hand, I am sometimes consumed by the strongest, most negative emotions I've ever experienced after sitting for extended periods. Since starting meditation, I've had numerous anxiety attacks and periods of rage. For the first time in my life, it became really real to me that I was going to die. A lot of anxiety that I had apparently suppressed over the years came to a head, which was anything but pleasant. I've had numerous health issues which I largely attribute to stress, so it's not like my life has been stress-free from the meditation. I've also been pushed towards examining most of my beliefs, particularly of a religious/spiritual nature, and have had to let go of a lot of things that used to give me comfort. To paraphrase the buddhist doctrine, life is suffering, and everything is subject to change. Meditation has many benefits but I'm not of the opinion that there is a steady state of happiness/bliss that can be achieved. I think the best that can be done is to deal with difficult situations more gracefully, as they are unceasing, and to show compassion towards our fellow beings, as they are struggling under the same delusions, prejudices, and pains that we are.

angusgr 16y ago
A lot of anxiety that I had apparently suppressed over the years came to a head, which was anything but pleasant I obviously don't know you or your situation, but is it possibly a good thing that these suppressed things are coming out now? In the long run, perhaps you can work through them and you'll be in a better place at the end?
- flatline 16y ago
  That's the idea, and dealing with this kind of stuff is part of most of the spiritual traditions that I've investigated over the years. I definitely think that meditation has been and continues to be a worthwhile pursuit, for this as well as the relaxation aspects. I did have an idea going in that the benefits would all be of a calming nature, and was somewhat surprised to find that, at least for me, this was not the case.
cmchugh 16y ago
Regarding negative feelings after meditation, I am grateful that you mentioned it because I had these too and this is the first time I've heard from anyone with a similar experience. I took up regular meditation last Spring, sitting 30-40 minutes daily in my best approximation of zazen. I found the meditation quite relaxing and on some days I felt much better afterwards or had small insights about my life. Other days were not so pleasant. I believe I experienced a sharper awareness of the stress I felt at work (which in the past I would have denied feeling at all) and I was much more likely to notice when I became distracted at work, resulting in growing frustration and anxiety. I think it also made me more aware of the shallowness of my relationships with my coworkers and my own reluctance to engage with them. Overall I suppose it's been a positive and educational experience.
- thomas11 16y ago
  Preparing you for these (transient) negative feelings is a standard of Buddhist meditation teaching. At least it's in the foundational texts and it was mentioned in the few Buddhist groups I've attended. It would be unfortunate if modern meditation guides would leave that out.
Confusion 16y ago
I've had sudden fits of anger and anxiety caused by, well, the realization of being alive means, only I don't meditate. You may have inferred causation where there is merely correlation: I find it all too likely that the impulses that drive one to take up meditation are the same ones that drive one to consider 'life'... and suffer the consequences of those considerations. I.e. You're just getting older and wiser, with or without meditation.

angusgr 16y ago

A lot of anxiety that I had apparently suppressed over the years came to a head, which was anything but pleasant I obviously don't know you or your situation, but is it possibly a good thing that these suppressed things are coming out now? In the long run, perhaps you can work through them and you'll be in a better place at the end?

flatline 16y ago
That's the idea, and dealing with this kind of stuff is part of most of the spiritual traditions that I've investigated over the years. I definitely think that meditation has been and continues to be a worthwhile pursuit, for this as well as the relaxation aspects. I did have an idea going in that the benefits would all be of a calming nature, and was somewhat surprised to find that, at least for me, this was not the case.

cmchugh 16y ago

Regarding negative feelings after meditation, I am grateful that you mentioned it because I had these too and this is the first time I've heard from anyone with a similar experience. I took up regular meditation last Spring, sitting 30-40 minutes daily in my best approximation of zazen. I found the meditation quite relaxing and on some days I felt much better afterwards or had small insights about my life. Other days were not so pleasant. I believe I experienced a sharper awareness of the stress I felt at work (which in the past I would have denied feeling at all) and I was much more likely to notice when I became distracted at work, resulting in growing frustration and anxiety. I think it also made me more aware of the shallowness of my relationships with my coworkers and my own reluctance to engage with them. Overall I suppose it's been a positive and educational experience.

thomas11 16y ago
Preparing you for these (transient) negative feelings is a standard of Buddhist meditation teaching. At least it's in the foundational texts and it was mentioned in the few Buddhist groups I've attended. It would be unfortunate if modern meditation guides would leave that out.

Confusion 16y ago

I've had sudden fits of anger and anxiety caused by, well, the realization of being alive means, only I don't meditate. You may have inferred causation where there is merely correlation: I find it all too likely that the impulses that drive one to take up meditation are the same ones that drive one to consider 'life'... and suffer the consequences of those considerations. I.e. You're just getting older and wiser, with or without meditation.